[Counselor's Office] When the days are cold...

Yeah, well, a lot of other, much worse, things are supposed to be the other way around as well, doc. William said, his laugh coming much drier, and much more bitter than he had actually intended. He couldn't help it, though, his mind immediately jumping to a long list of people who should have helped him before Wong, instead of leaving it all to a counselor, from his parents, to every teacher who he had cursed before. And that was the point of it all right there, his self-absorption put aside for now to be addressed at a latter point, possible when the man was once again himself: Wong did help him. He had kicked and screamed the first time he had been dragged in the office, and the man didn't even seemed fazed by this childish temper tantrum. and when William clearly refused his helped, he didn't give up. He had kept pushing instead, probably with some urging from either one or both of his Summons, which in William's mind only gave him extra points-Spirit and Warrior could be down right scary sometimes. And in the end, it helped. William broke, even if it was just once, and he was better for it. Not by much, but yeah, better in some way he couldn't explain.

So, anyway, to cut a pathetic story of self-discovery short, it appeared to be his turn now to coax the man in letting him help, even if the man didn't really want to, just like William himself hadn't at some point. So he said, getting up to his feet again, and taking a few short steps to the waste bin, before throwing his cup in there will be no eventually. he said, focusing his eyes on the now dark-haired man. I'll be getting you back there today. he said in a voice that left no room for discussion. Then, after thinking what effect a statement like that would have on himself, he carefully added I, uh, planed going to the city myself anyway. he said, his confidence wavering as he added almost shyly. I need a lot of notebooks if I'm going to catch up to all the note-writing I have missed.

It was something he had decided recently, inside his head, quietly, in a place where he could barely hear himself, let alone anyone else. The intention had been vague, wavering between coming through and never seeing light of day, until he woke up one day (today) and decided that he will do it, and he will start by buying himself enough notebooks to copy all the notes that he had missed, if he could find someone willing to lend them to him, that is... However, instead of making it seem real and more probable, stating that fragile intention that had been living inside his mind closely to a month now made it seem less then achievable, impossible; and for a short moment of silence, he had a panic attack like never before. He composed himself quickly enough though; there was no going back now. He had already said it, making it a promise to the world instead of just himself, and, well, it was weapon like no other if he was going to get Wong to let him help, if the man cared enough to be interested that is...

Insecurity was much harder to shake off than any moment of deep introspective, which was why he was grateful for yet another burst of short, bitter laughter, for that last sentence that Wong said sounded too much like a prayer that William had been repeating to himself late into the night frequently for the last month.

Well, for once, you can leave this god-damned office. William said, giving the man a smile. And yeah, it isn't healthy, you would know that, but sometimes, it's the only thing you can do, isn't it? Hide. he said, shrugging his shoulders and refusing to think how that was what he had been doing since arriving here anyway. Until you get your head straight at least. he offered, wondering if he should say that Wong didn't seem like he could be of much help to anyone right now anyway, or was that pushing it too far.

Come on. Go book shopping with me. All of this mess...It will still be here when you come back.

Honestly, doc. William said, sighing, as he heard the counsellor's explanation, his expression stuck somewhere between amusement and disbelief. You think too much. he said, looking at Wong with stern eyes despite the small smile still lingering on his lips. And I'm not saying that you shouldn't care, for God knows when idiots like me would end up then, but sometimes, you have to do right by yourself first. Which, in this case, William though, was also what was right by everyone else. The man was a mess and in no shape to help anyone, but William wasn't cruel enough to tell him that, or at least not phrased like that.

It's not your problem that the school hired a pregnant lady. he scoffed, looking at Wong and his tired demeanour. Plus, she probably doesn't mind working while pregnant, having applied to a job while carrying the bun around and all. he said, half unaware of what he was saying, simply trying to think of anything that would pry Wong out of the Office. It didn't seem to be working though.

I... he started, still staring at the man, searching desperately for anything to say as the silence stretched from seconds to minutes. In the end, he let his shoulders fall again, his insecurities settling in his chest again. I'll probably fail the year anyway he muttered in the end, looking away. But I gotta try anyway. Sort of made a promise to Spirit. he said, turning towards the wolf, asking him silently with his eyes if he knew what he should do now. In the end he settled for the truth, Spirit's empty silence not helping him at all.

I don't know what to say, doc. he spoke carefully, trying to find the right words. I don't know how it is to fear the silence, mostly because I don't really remember silence, really. he always had someone around him these days, and couldn't be happier for than on some days. So, yeah, I don't know how to help you with that fear. Between the two of us, you are, in the end, the one with the psychological degree. he said, giving Wong a small, amused smile, But at this point even someone like me can see that this isn't healthy, and not just in a psychological way. You need a shower, and a fresh set of clothing, some food too probably. And what's worse, it isn't just me saying it. Even a ten year old could see that, quite literary. he said, remembering the small girl that had greeted him. She couldn't have been older than ten, right?

So, yeah, the world doesn't stop turning just for you. he said, frowning and biting into his lower lip. And yeah, people don't wait. But honestly? he said, raising his eyes to Wong's. The world doesn't need to stop. You are not carrying the weight of the world, doc. Heck, you are not even carrying the weight of this school. The words sounded harsh to his ears, so he desperately hopped that he was still on the right end of the line even after saying them.

So, let's just get you home. he continued, his voice quieter now as he spoke. And I promise not to let people ask you questions, and to lead you right back here when you're done with your apartment. It wasn't what the man needed, but it was quite obvious that it was what he wanted. And I'll come visit you again in a few days. he said, while silently vowing tomorrow in his head. Bring you some food, help you with something if I can and so on. It was a compromise, and he hoped that Wong would accept it.

William knew almost from the beginning, even before he had said his first word, that this was far beyond his grasp, having been miles away from any help that he could give from the moment he walked through the door, and steadily moving faster, and further and further away as the seconds walked by. He, however, refused to give up, throw his hands in the air and just say he was done. He was stubborn, like that, Spirit knew, though this time the need to help went much deeper than that-William wanted to return the favour, to help Wong like he had helped him, and hopefully, that conviction would be stronger, or at least just as strong, as what to Spirit seemed as, at least, quite a lot self inflicted blame.

Do you want to quit? William asked, his voice suddenly ice cold. He had dropped his eyes to the floor the moment counselor had started speaking about quitting, and was raising his head only now that the man had stopped speaking, his expression blank and his eyes seemingly made of stone.

Because if you do, that's perfectly fine. he said, though something in the way he carried himself spoke volumes against that. It's just like I said: sometimes, you gotta do right by yourself. There was a moment in silence in which William did nothing more but take a deep breath, somewhat gathering his thoughts.

If, however he said, continuing in the same emotionless tone you have drawn that conclusion from anything that I have just said, I swear to God I shall kill you myself! he suddenly exploded, his anger finally there for every one to see, as it erased all of his insecurities as he did everything but yell at the man that he nothing but respected.

I am trying to help you here, doc, not make you cut your veins! he continued, his shoulders shaking as he tried to suppress his anger (fear, feeling of being out to deep). Have I not just said that you shouldn't stop caring? Because if you don't care, heaven knows who will. I, personally, know, that the system won't, that school won't. For fuck's sake, I'm going school-shopping because of what you have said! I'm...I'm listening in class! I haven't been in a fight in a fucking month! Not one! Not even when there was three against one that last time. he said, his shoulders suddenly going still, before they fell down as he breathed out in a deep sigh.

And that is more than my own goddamned Summons could make me do. And they are a part of my fucking soul./B] he finished, his voice calm and quiet. And I know that I am just one case. But if even after all that, if in the light of all this, you still think, he adds to himself, but doesn't actually say it out loud) don't deserve this job, if you're nothing more but a waste of space...then I honestly don't know who does, and god help all the idiots that inhabit this place. Myself included, somewhere towards the top of that list.

Spirit says nothing at the end of his rant, and William takes that as a sign that he had done something right, even though his heart beats about hundred milles per hours as he expect the punishments to start rolling his way.

I'm an idiot with anger management problems and what would probably be consider too much self-confidence, but, sure, whatever you say, doc. the boy said, dragging one of his hands through his hair as he tried to fish some sort of tissue from a considerable number of pockets his jeans and jacket had when combined. Finding none, he took a long look around Wong's office, thinking how it was probably impossible for a counselor's office not to have them, and on finding them a few seconds later pulled a whole box off the shelf, presenting it to Wong.

And don't worry about being sorry., he added, leaning against the desk again. With how many people I have worried in my life, I probably deserve for some of that weight to be thrown back at me. he said, giving Wong a small smile. He felt a bit lighter after his outburst, as if he had gotten something awfully heavy off his chest, however, you couldn't help but feel just as tired as well. The outburst have taken so much of his already drained by school energy that he was almost considering calling the whole school-shopping thing off and just going back to his room and falling into bad. He pushed the idea aside though before it could take root in his mind, for it wasn't really an option now, not when he had finally managed to, well, convince Wong to let him take him back to his apartment.

Of course, doc. he said in the end, giving another warm-yet-tired smile as the man almost asked him if they could go already. That was kind of the point of this all. he said, rolling his eyes as the Warrior finally came back from his room, William's empty school bag cast over his shoulder, an edge of the probably pages long list of the needed notebooks sticking out of one of the barely closed pockets.

You sure? William asked, as he bent down to pick up some of the things that Wong have knocked down from the table, a few pens, and what looked like pure white marbles. Interested, the boy started at them for a few seconds, examining them with quiet curiosity, before putting every thing back to its place.

I guess we are going, then. he said, taking his bag back from Warrior and putting it back onto his shoulders, carefully stopping near Wong's wheelchair. Feeling like he had pushed the man enough today, from simply showing up to that last outburst, William quietly asked: Need any help with that, doc? while pointing to the chair with his head. Still standing at the door, Warrior looked over both of them, before settling his eyes on the wolf in the room, only to get a silent shake of a head in return. Later. the creature thought as he watched William interact with Wong. For right now, everything seems to be standing on some kind of a fragile edge. he whispered to himself, practically begin able to smell the anxiety that the older man felt, which, he just knew somehow, was sure to be accompanied with a deep sense of wrongness.

Careful there, William. he said, warning the boy both to be careful not to knock something down as he struggled to get the list out of his backpack without actually taking the backpack off his back, and not to push Wong any further, for he just might break him.