Something to Hold on to [Clockwise Dream]

With still having no room-mate in sight, Lionel had let the music get perhaps a little too loud as he worked on the last of the adjustment his latest school project needed before it could be sent out, his head nodding to the loud words as he clicked a button after button, so when he finally heard a loud knock on his door, he naturally assumed it was someone coming over to tell him to lower the volume down. Surprisingly, it was not. Instead he was met with a call down to the lounge, as Volkan was apparently waiting for him there. Shutting down the music along with saving changes to on his computer so that it could follow too, the young man smiled fondly as he thought about how his friend could be so awkward now when just a few nights ago...

A hand placed on a carefully wrapped gift made sure that the photo album he had made for Volkan was still there, full of photos of the man dancing, his flames bright and hot and he himself not too far behind them, self assure and seemingly lost in his own world. Honestly, it was quite mesmerizing, he thought, running down the stairs to the lounge, meeting the other man waiting for him there with a bright, amused smile.

''You could have just gone upstairs, you know'', he said as he met him. ''It's not exactly forbidden, and you know the way.''

''It is nice to see you too'', Lionel said, chuckling, his voice still slightly amused. ''I'm glad you came'', he said, the look in his eyes becoming a bit more teasing and sharper. ''You know, like I invited you to?'', he said, pretty sure that Volkan would understand what he meant: how could the other man be intruding when it was Lionel who had called him over to the dorms?

''Let's go upstairs then'', he then invited the other man, heading out of the room for the hallways. ''I have something for you, just like I promised'', he said, not really nervous, but a little uncertain about whether Volkan would like his gift. He did say, however, that taking pictures of him while he was fire dancing was okay, and besides, it wasn't like there were only his pictures in the album, Lionel had taken photos of the whole night, from the beginning, with the people gathered around the entrance, each and every one of them obviously excited, to the very last minute of the closing. He had even had some one had pictures of himself while he handled the lions in the ring, though he had put only one or two of them in the book, feeling like they weren't really as good as the others.

Besides, the whole thing was not about him any way, it was about Volkan and the Circus, he thought, as he opened the door to his room.

''Come on in'', he said, asking Volkan in once again, as by now he had a feeling he had come to know the other man at least that well. ''Feel free to sit down anywhere'', he added as he sat down on the chair by his desk himself. On his bed, the lion Volkan had won him sat proudly on by the pillow.

''Not really'', the lion tamer said when asked whether he had been busy. ''Just adding some finishing touched to a school project, but that's nothing important. And, well, there is this'', he added, turning back towards where he had left the photo album.

''First though, lesson number one'', he said, the photo album now resting in his hands. It had taken him some time to do that properly, considering he had not actually wrapped any presents in a while, but in the end, he had managed to make the simple black and white wrapping look neat, if not professional. ''You can come up here whenever you want'', he said, giving the other man a smile. ''You only need to knock. Especially if I had called you over.''

And he planned to do that, he thought, as he watched the fire dancer pat the small stuffed lion on the head.

''I've sort of named him Kovu'', he said then, indicating the lion with his head. ''You know, like in the Lion King?'', he added, just a bit unsure if the other man would get the reference. He had thought about naming if after one of the lions his mother had worked with at the research and rescue centers, once the idea about the naming the lion in the first place had entered his head, sometimes early in the morning when he was too tired too think but still refusing to go to sleep as he was just about finished with what he was working on. In the end, he had decided he could not pick just one favorite lion and the stuffed animal had ended up named after a fictional one.

''And here'', he said then, handing his gift to Volkan at least. ''This is me returning the favor for you winning him for me'', he said, a smile still on his face, though it was turning just a little bit nervous yet again.

''Yeah'', Lionel said, as he repeated himself yet again, yet somehow not minding it at all. ''I say so'', he said, looking sort of fondly at the other man, thinking how it was almost cute, the way he was kind of awkward in the situations like these... as long as he did not think about the fact meaning he had probably not had a chance to be in them much before.

Shaking his head from such serious thought, Lionel focused on the way Volkan opened his gifts, and was soon impressed. ''Neat'', he said, looking at how Volkan had simply sliced the side of it open instead of ripping the paper open like anybody else would. ''Also, somehow, makes me feel much better considering I have spent almost half an hour wrapping that thing up'', he said, a giant smile on his face.

''Also'', he added, his brightness toning down a bit, as it always did when he was about to say something serious, ''Of course I was serious. I am always serious'', he soon, however, turned it into a joke again, not letting the serious mood linger where it should not do so. ''Especially when it comes to the important stuff'', he added still, just to make sure he was understood.

''I tried to focus on you while also including the rest of the Circus as well'', he said in a way of explanation some moments later as Volkan stared at the album, but said nothing about it. ''I thought about making it digital at first, so it would be harder to lose and easier to handle, but when I actually thought about it I realized that doing so would be counterproductive considering you wouldn't have as much chance to see it. I still have a digital copy up on a Cloud though'', he said, pointing to the computer, ''and in a few more places, just in case something happens to it, you know'', he said, shrugging his shoulders lightly before falling silent again, watching Volkan watch his gift.

''I, do you like?'', he asked, however, a few minutes later, not really being all that good with the long silences. ''I know you don't like your photo taken, but it was during a show, and you said that was okay?'', his voice wavered there a bit, as he was still unsure about that. ''You can just remove photos of yourself, though, if you do not wish to look at them, but I figured you have probably never seen your own act, you know, which is really a shame, since you look really hot handling those flames'', he said, his words not really intentional, but not something he wished he could take back either. After all, he did think Volkan was hot, and it was no longer their first meeting either, though the other man did still seem a little nervous around him...

''I'm glad'', Lionel said, as Volkan finally announced verbally that he did, in fact, like his gift, smiling, one tenth in relief.

''I must admit I was worried a bit'', he admitted, looking at the photos at which Volkan had left the album open, his own face staring back at him or well, at the lions jumping through the hops at the edge of the scene, rather, for a few seconds, before the other man closed the album again, putting it away. ''That you would not like it'', the young photographer continued, rising his eyes towards Volkan's again and giving him a bright grin. ''So I'm really glad that the rest of me turned out to be right instead of that part.''

Part which might not have been big but have been with him all the same ever since he had started running around the Circus a few nights ago, trying to catch everything on film. He was glad, as much as he was glad the Volkan liked his gift, that it would not finally shut up.

''It took a bit of a running around, yeah'', Lionel said, humming under his breath. ''But it was worth it, so it wasn't really that hard, all in all'', he said, shrugging his shoulders lightly. ''I mostly didn't feel it until the morning, anyway. Felt like I did three shows in a row instead of just one for an hour'', he laughed. ''I've had worse, though, so I barely even noticed, really'', he added, even though it most certainly wasn't like that. He had felt every muscle in his arms reminding him he had been running around with a heavy camera in his hands for a whole evening, he just hadn't cared, and Volkan most certainly did not need to know that.