Of Virtues Past (Closed)

@"fish_with_a_pencil"
Considering the fact that @"DerLampman" and I've started for Terrance and Jaya, you've got free reign on what you want Cassie to be. For the ability, I think we can choose for ourselves now too. Jaya (Charity) has hers innate but Terrance's was a gift. The point here now is that their story has to show why they are given the title as the "virtue". I do like you're idea of having a half angel plagued with anxiety hehe. Go for it~ (all the more reason Terrance would dote on her)

oh right @"Penumbra" @"DerLampman" @"fish_with_a_pencil" @"Anzellous"
i think i might need to ask in what order the kids were taken in by Hellen and Gene
story purposes so we know stuff

i've marked terrance with 2 years prior to now (he was 15 then and now he's 17)
persephone and jaya are apparently found together but idk at what point in time were they found by gene and hellen

so we just need to know who was found first, second and so on?
i would have liked to think it was terrance that was found first but, i'd need everyone's input on this

I think Cassie would come around soon after Terrence, so maybe a year and a half ago (she was 12 then), to give them time to bond. At first, Cassie's gonna be really shy. She didn't know her parents very well, and she certainly doesn't know much about angels and angel things. After she gets settled in, she'll become more energetic and childish.

She's 13-14 ish now, but I'm not sure if she should know her age. I'm kinda liking the whole forsaken child thing going on... If not, she'll be 14 for sure, and she lived with her human parent.

@"Kaya and Gang"

Personality seems appropriate. I really like it - straight to the point, and fits well with the drama I envision (and am working on) for Jaya / Charity (she has trust issues especially with people who seem nice because of her past so this works into the dynamic I keep picturing).

Ability wise, the concept's an interesting one. I realize it's a draft but I'll just say this here: this power is going to need a lot of definition. It feels essentially like a massive gamebreaking lockdown on its own, but with the proper details it could be one of the more interesting abilities I've seen so far on the site. Also, there's plenty of potential there for shenanigans (cuts away abilities they're proud of, but I suggest you don't explicitly say "powers", so for example if she cuts my drunk dude Emman she'll end up cutting away his alcohol tolerance) but again, there needs to be detail.

As for the sword, well, a sword's fine, I guess, but the "can change into anything" clause is problematic. Anything with unlimited shapeshifting capabilities has a lot of potential to just break narrative. (Or unlimited anything for that matter.)

Hope this helps.

@"Kaya and Gang"

Better restriction of the transformation; this is good (still leaves some room to be creative but I doubt Hellen would at any point transform it into a skyscraper-sized katana and reason out that a katana is still one-handed). Not sure if the transformation is purely physical or it copies properties and / or abilities as well though - that might end up problematic if it comes down to it.

Effect seems like psychological and / or spiritual lobotomy more than power removal, which is a more fun idea (in my opinion; I tend to be biased toward psychological abilities which is why people I know call me a blue player but that's an Mt:G thing and I'm getting off track). It probably won't work as well against strong-willed characters the way it's written, which makes perfect sense considering it's a spiritual attack. It also sounds like a stacking, cumulative effect that works better in a drawn-out battle. For me, I think that fits her theme of bringing the prideful down; if it were an instant effect they could always justify it as being caught off-guard, but in a battle of attrition there is no excuse to save their pride. (I also imagine it like a weird beating-the-lesson-into-your-body thing.)

Angelic power is a bit vague - enhanced physical capabilities may or may not be gamebreakers depending on the degree. Sure, if she's only three times peak human, she's still easy enough to deal with, but if she's thirty times or something like that... well, I think you see what I'm getting at. How much more dexterity does she have? How much more strength? Is it constant, or is it an adrenaline rush sort of thing? Does her stamina also scale similarly, or is it normal?

[small]I'm just probably being nitpicky about stuff, but I've seen enough people go to town and ruin things with power abuse, so yeah, this is kinda a serious thing I do.[/small]

@"Kaya and Gang"

Completed and Accepted:
Temperance http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/6997
Charity http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/6998
Humility http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/7194
Kindness http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/7205
Chastity http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/7356

5 out of 7

WIP:
Diligence http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/7015
Patience http://159.65.241.122/index.php?threads/7040