straight to hell in my sunday best

From what Felix learned in classes, in the field and a whole bunch of Quentin Tarantino movies, there was nothing crime lords appreciated more than moxie. That, or the daring hero got shot, but it was a fortunate thing that he heard Klaus Rosales had a sense of humor and a weak spot for a pretty face... and if all else fails, he'd wake up in his usual checkpoint in the hospital. So, what could it hurt? He took a deep breath.

Here goes everything.

Felix peered into the street from the alley he was hiding in. There were four guards stationed next to and near the gate with very intimidating looking AK-47 rifles. He didn't feel anything but loathing for their kind, really. He'd been through enough shit in India that his first instinct upon seeing them was to bash their heads in with a jagged rock until their heads cracked open like eggs and stop, this isn't helping any.

Instead, he signaled to his friend above one of the nearby buildings — one who owed him a favor so he let himself get dragged into, as he would put it, "shitty goddamn stunt, what the fuck Felix" — who then dropped a ball of fire down to the street below right in front of the Rosales gang guards. Felix worked his magic and reshaped the light into a large flaming beast with dangerous rows of teeth, taunting the guards until they followed it away from the gate and out into the street. Felix unlocked the gate with his lockpicking set in a hurry, dropping a bug near a bed of rocks and wrapping a chain around his waist to be used as proof later.

There was a brief window of opportunity to move into the building while the next round of guards passed by the gate and saw the stunt he pulled. He made a sprint into the building, climbed the back ladder with abandon and very casually entered a supply closet. He listened to the bug with an earbud connected to bluetooth in his ear.

"--oly shit, did someone get in?"

"Should we tell the boss?"

"Nah... nah, look, it didn't look like forced entry. It's probably just one guy."

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Someone would just shoot him. Poor stupid bastard."

"Right, right. Better not to piss off Klaus, you know?"

"Yeah. Let's just look for him ourselves."

Ah, shit. His heart was beating like a jackhammer. That was what spy movies didn't tell you. They were nervewracking as hell.

From what he gathered in that conversation, intel was right, at least. Klaus was here. That was cue to get the hell out so out he went, deeper into the belly of the beast. Past this corridor was an intimidating metal catwalk. There were people below, but it didn't look like they were paying attention to what was going on above them. The meeting room was up ahead. Felix walked...

"You there!"


Felix turned around, facing the person, tempted to just push him off the goddamn catwalk — "Yes?"

"Who the hell are you, kid?"

"Oh, did Klausy not tell you his boyfriend was coming?" Felix rubbed his cheek. "Ah, sorry, this is so awkward. I thought you knew — this is my first time here, hi, I'm Felix. I'm so glad to meet his friends!" Felix extended a hand to shake.

Suspicious as his presence might've been, heartbeat beating like crazy in his chest, the guard took in Felix's appearance and his casual demeanor and, hopefully thought to himself, he would get fucked if he shot his boss's new squeeze. They shook hands and exchanged pleasantries, and Felix walked off. He was near the meeting room when he heard the guard's walkie talkie go off.

Shit.

"Hey, you!" the guard screamed, and Felix made a sprint for the meeting room, awkwardly entering a room full of criminals with Klaus Rosales at the very end of a table. Felix, cheeks flushed and panting, unwrapped the chain from his waist, padlock and all, and dropped it on the meeting table.

He was supposed to say something, right?

"So, uh, how do I join?"

His intrusion was met with laughter, which only meant this was a resounding success.

Felix didn't stand a chance against this room of thugs, but that was why he went straight to the head. His reading of Klaus was surprisingly correct. He could feel him leering from behind his sunglasses. His pretty face was good for a something after all.

He was unfazed as Klaus invaded his personal bubble. He raised his arms by protocol, allowing him to be patted down. Klaus would then find a lockpicking set, a knife, a phone, police badge, and an earplug with bluetooth. He would let all this be taken. It was a show of trust. Klaus was going to be his new boss, but his eye lingered on the sidearm for a few seconds, images of taking it and pumping Klaus full of bullets vivid in his mind.

The room stunk of demon magic wrapping around him like serpent's coil.

He smiled sweetly.

"I'd like to make my intentions clear right now. I don't intend to stab you, but, of course, search if you must. It's only customary. We do that at the precinct, too." That was probably going to catch his attention. He met his eyes or, rather, sunglasses. "Detective Felix Verma of the MCPD. And no, this is not a sting, I don't have any bugs or microphones on me, double check if you want." He unbuttoned the first three buttons of his shirt, opening it a bit to show a distinct lack of wires.

"I did want to go with flashy. I wanted to impress you. That's how you pick your men, right? You decide that you want them? I want to be one of yours." He blushed even redder, as if surprised by the sudden bluntness. "That is, ah, I hear you pay well, and my mom is in the hospital. I'll do anything. Having another cop on your side would be good, right?"

Felix held a sincerity as he met Klaus' eyes. Klaus was much bigger and more dangerous than he was, and Felix was undoubtedly fish bait in a pool of sharks. Despite it all, he refused to break. His gaze softened when Klaus warmed up to his greeting. This wasn't the end of his caution, but it meant he could take a deep breath.

"Bold? Ah, yeah, this entrance might be. But I've been planning this for weeks. I'm glad it's as effortless at it seems."

"My mother is in India. She's part of the untouchables, so it would be difficult to reach her. It's a little costly, but I can give you her address." He hadn't thought of it this far, but a few years ago when he flew off to get rid of his brother, he'd gotten close to his aunt. He was sure she wouldn't mind him sending a few thousands in her way, even if it was dirty money. The money wasn't the fucking point.

Felix nodded. He'd heard about his relationship with his mother, Nerea Rosales. An obvious soft spot, for sure. "I'll do anything for my mother," he said, and despite the impossibility of him taking care of her now, he was hundred percent confident about her. He would do anything for her. Still will.

And then the interview questions came.

"All right!" He nodded. "Thank you, thank you for this opportunity, Mr. Rosales. I won't let you down." He paused thoughtfully, running over the questions in his head. "Aside from the obvious benefits of having a cop on your side, I have training, a doctorate in Criminology, a license in spellcasting —" He waved his hand, and in a flash, the their surroundings melted into a sea of color, flashing into a beautiful countryside, and back again, "— I can organize, sneak, pick locks, cook, lie, divert, shoot a target in the air. If that's not convincing, I can sit around and look pretty. Anything you need, I can learn it pretty quick."

At the second question, he answered quickly: "My mother. I can't expect you to take me by my word, so at least believe that I'm doing this for her, and I don't want her to get hurt. I'll make sure you don't give any reasons to hurt her."

Can he handle lying, he asked, and he was tempted to laugh. Instead, he smiled. "I don't think lying would be a problem. Lying is one of the lighter things we'll have to do, right? I can lie just fine."

The last question was tricky, but nobody said he had to give real answers. "I like to think I'm on the gray area. I respect the peace, but I would choose family over a concept any time. I'll do most things to get my paycheck, but I don't stand for the fucked up shit, like sexual assault, harming kids or hate crimes, all right? I'm here to work, not to make things worse. Is that agreeable to you?"

Felix could feel Klaus leering at him as he talked, and he half-wanted to rip his throat out and shove it in his mouth. He chuckled awkwardly at the compliment and mock bowed. Being flashy at the right time was a hard-earned talent. "Thank you, thank you. I didn't think you'd go for the sitting pretty bit! I always fancied a profession in doing nothing, but talent agents always tell me I fall... short." He placed his hand a few inches above him. Short as in height. Male models were usually taller. Not that Felix ever fancied that vapid garbage anyway, but it was a fun thing to say.

It looked like Klaus was already convinced. Who said his outrageous displays didn't go for anything? He looked surprised at the next question, and then he cringed, baring his teeth and awkwardly dragging a, "you seeee..."

Felix sighed and walked over to where Klaus was, leaning against the table so he was standing next to him. Truth be told, he didn't anticipate this question. Most people would just accept his qualifications, or ask him to legitimize them instead of questioning why this. You're overqualified for this line of work, kid.

He met his eyes finally, looking guilty and uncomfortable. Lying was just improv off-stage. "I was hoping to bring this up to you a few weeks after I've been an official member, but all right." He sighed, as if he was going to ask him a huge favor, and it was very difficult of him to ask Klaus about it so soon. "I picked you out of all the criminals around here because you have the most connections. The fact of the matter is that India gets very suspicious of foreign money coming in, especially foreign money going to the untouchables. I was hoping I could ask you, or someone you know, to send the money to some of my family's networks down there... if that's all right with you. It's not legal. That's why I came to you. Just please send them my six months in advance. You don't have to pay me for that six months, I am your humble servant."

He had to mentally cringe at the elaborate task, but it fit his whole flashy entrance, explained all the plotholes in his story. At the change of topic, he nodded thoughtfully. "That's what I've heard as well. Your people get in holding a lot, Mr. Rosales, but never for sexual assault. I appreciate that you have standards."

That request was going to be the last one before he was going to tell him he was hired. He couldn't turn it down. Felix paused thoughtfully and took Klaus' hand into his own, Klaus' fingers lightly splayed on his palm.

"My magic alters what people see, manipulating the very light coming into people's eyes that sends signals to their brain. A clever trick, a powerful illusion. It's all limited to sight, though. A good diversion, but not too solid as ground support." Despite their hands feeling the same, Klaus was going to see his fingers melt into his, flesh turning into branches, branches wrapping around flesh. Felix pulled his hand back and walked backward as the room began to melt into a beautiful field of roses. The roses formed into clusters and spiked into buildings, turning into a giant bustling metropolis. It was all sight, of course. It smelled and felt nothing like any of what he'd seen. Felix snapped his fingers, and the view disappeared just as quick. "It's a gift from my goddess. Do you have any requests?"