Don't Hit Another Man's Son

Logan wasn't just pushing his luck anymore, it'd gone past that point as soon as he'd shared a heated kiss with Nick in public. This had moved into ripping his life apart territory-- but it'd already been violently tearing at the seams. Logan was very, very tired. Maybe he was tired enough that he'd decided to simply push himself off a cliff, rather than live with the stress of hanging over the ledge, never quite knowing if you were safe or not, holding on with a single, slipping finger.

Poetic nonsense aside, while at the Winter Holidays party, he'd thrown himself at Nick like he could barely stand to keep his hands off of him. And he really couldn't. Being with him so openly and comfortably, talking and giving little touches, it was too much. When he'd headed home, later, he was fully anticipating the consequences of his actions. He'd been beaten near senseless by his stepfather Adam.

It wasn't as scary as Logan had assumed it'd be. In fact, the thought that he might die, this time around, only gave him a special sort of boldness. That of someone with nothing to lose. He didn't want to go down quietly. When Adam had yelled at him, Logan yelled right back, until his voice was hoarse and cracking. For the first time in his whole life, he defended himself.

And it caught Adam off guard enough for Logan to get away from him. He packed his essentials and left, unsure what he was doing with himself. Perhaps he'd just stay away long enough for things to cool down, then crawl back and apologize.

Maybe he'd never come back. It was what he'd always been terrified of, getting disowned by his family, known for what he was to the general population, a filthy, evil person, with filthy evil blood in his veins. But now that it seemed to be at risk of really happening, he couldn't even think straight about it, couldn't register it, couldn't feel anything towards it.

Logan wanted to stop being afraid.

He'd gone back to the party late that night once he got out of his house, looking to find Nick again. When he found him, Logan had clumsily asked to live with him. That'd gone over pleasantly, but then… Nick, Billy, his dad, had found out about the fresh, sensitive bruises covering his skin. Hadn't been happy about it. Logan had assumed he was angry with him, initially, but he wasn't. He'd said he was worried, and then, had lost his temper, storming off to go try and hurt Adam back for what he did to Logan.

And Logan was… in foreign territory. He'd never had a parent worry about him. Or, for that matter, get angry for him rather than simply at him. His real father had never stopped presenting firsts, for Logan. He remained at the party, flustered, unable to make himself try and stop any of this. He was anxious about what might happen if Nick recklessly went after Adam, but he didn't have the heart to go against it. Lord, why would he? How could he possibly dig into himself and bring out the desire to stop Nick from caring about him, even if it was in a dangerous way? That seemed worse than idiotic. It was insane. It was the opposite of what Logan desired.

And he didn't argue with Nick, on the big things. He was the one parent who had earned Logan's loyalty, and he didn't want him to regret that. He wanted to finally be good, for family. A simple, but powerful wish. He'd never gotten the chance, before, only false hope and desperation, but nothing solid. Now, with the Grahams, with Billy, he couldn't screw up. He had to be good to them, just like they'd been good to him.

When he got the text, he held his breath, and rushed from the party. Logan took a cab to the slightly funny location Nick gave him-- an Arby's near his neighborhood. The closer he got, the louder the sirens were, and his held breath felt like it'd been kicked out of him. What had Nick done? There was only one way to find out. Logan exited the cab and climbed up after Nick, up to the Arby's roof.

"Oh," Logan murmured, faint. He sank down, knees wobbly, and sat there beside him. He couldn't tell what was happening, past the fact that it had to be his house on fire in the distance, though it was fading. He couldn't tell if it was mild or not, simply a warning, or if the Delacroixes were burning up. It didn't even matter to him, right then. His heart hammered in his chest, face radiating warmth.

He was more in love with Nick than ever. Logan took a break from watching the fire to look at him with his big, round, smitten eyes.

Damn it all to Hell. His life really was a hot mess.

Logan was burning like it was the hottest summer day of the year, even though it was in the middle of winter, and cold out. He silently chewed a mozzarella stick, eyes glued to Nick, listening to and hanging on every word he said. He couldn't bear to interrupt him, add anything, with what he was saying. He just wanted to let it all sink into his skin, down to his bones, and have it stay there forever. He watched Nick stand up, tall and straighter than he'd ever seen from him, and it made him feel like everything would be okay. This was what a parent was supposed to be, the more questionable aspects of their relationship aside.

The waterworks, predictably, came soon. Tears welling up as Nick talked about Nanna adopting him, that he deserved to be a Graham. "O-oh dear," he mumbled, rubbing his eyes, making a quiet choked sound and gnawing on his lip. A hiccup of a laugh, at Nick mentioned just cooking and eating them, instead of bothering with all the complicated law things. That was more like him, and everything else… offering so much, to do it the right way, to help him in this way… it meant a lot. Nick was speaking more than he usually did, laying things out, taking care of it. Taking care of him. Since when was Nick this responsible? Logan sniffled, vision blurry from crying. His dad was protecting him. It was warm, and safe, and important. He barely knew how to begin communicating his gratitude.

He squeezed his eyes shut and nodded quickly, then opening them and getting to his feet, following Nick back. Logan managed to stay mostly composed on the way, but as soon as they arrived, through the Starlight Academy campus, into the college dorm building and Nick's room, he latched onto Nick and sobbed, hiccuping. He held him tight. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he slurred, voice thick. "I love you. I love you so much. I-I'm in love with you, a-and I don't really care if that's sick. I won't let you down, not after everything you've d-done for me, I promise. Anything you ever want, I'll do it, be it, for you-- just say the word." He buried his face in pretty blond hair, trying to breath. "I know I'm a crybaby, but thank you for giving me a chance, dad, letting me have a family… I can never thank you enough. Thank you."

Logan sniffled and chuckled, amused, once he calmed down a little. He was dramatic, he knew. As long as Nick let him get away with it, he didn't mind how the man reacted. He pet his dad's hair and nodded cheerfully. Stop crying, he said, but Logan had to fight back more tears at hearing I'm your dad, I got your back, stated as a simple, hard fact. "I know," he said, softly. "But even if it's casual for you, it means everything to me. Can't take that away." He shrugged and beamed.

The boy flinched lightly at the clap on the shoulder, reminded of all his bruises again, grumbling under his breath. It was just embarrassing. It was true that Nick had hit him before, but it was because of him fucking up, not because of who he was. He could respect one, but not the other. He couldn't forgive Adam for hurting him before he could even understand why he was being hurt, and then, for things he couldn't truly control.

He went to the bathroom to wash his face and swallow down water, likely dehydrated. The makeup he'd had on was splashed off in the process, and he scowled at the splotches of ugly purple on his cheek, forehead, and jaw. He spat in the sink out of distaste, loathing settling into him for a moment before fading again, letting the cold water soothe him. He gave a tiny sigh, wondering if he really was never going back. He'd already been slowly moving out for a few months now, but having it actually happen was another case entirely. He swallowed. Life, how he wanted to live it. Was that possible? Was it real?

Drama queen. Logan left the bathroom and shrugged off clothing on the way there, then crawled into bed next to Nick, wrapping his long legs around him and resting his cheek on the blond's shoulder, peering at his phone. He supposed it was nicely timed, wrecking his own life right when winter break started, so he didn't have to drag himself to class or wait around for Nick to be free. "Well, I wasn't sure I'd be running away forever," Logan mumbled. "Mostly just didn't want to be murdered. Thought maybe it'd cool down, but… that's stupid, I know. Sorry if I'm awkward about it. Unlearning Catholic brainwashing and overall obedience is hard work."

He kissed the shoulder he'd been resting his cheek on. "I've fantasized about it a lot, though. It all kinda depends on how they first react. I don't know if they'll try to call me and get me to come back, or if Adam will turn his church against me, or if it'll be… radio silence. Hell, I don't even know if he tells mom everything he finds out about me, or my sisters, so they could be pretty clueless and not think I'm gone now at all." He paused. "That aside, my support system is pretty strong. I have a job to support myself. That's good, right?"

"Yeah," Logan mumbled, huffing and gently running his fingers over his own discolored skin. He perked up, suddenly, and flashed Nick a big grin. "Actually, I uh, did hit him… Only once, but it was enough to freak him out a bit, I think. Then we screamed at each other for a while, and I took off after that." He rubbed his knuckles thoughtfully. "I've never fought back before, and I look really girly, so I don't think he knew I could throw a punch." Sedation powers or not, Logan scoffed at the idea of being a completely out of shape, clueless serial killer.

He nodded shyly. There was no coming back from this, and Nick had told him not to, so he wouldn't try. His eyebrows shot up at the following plans, smile twitching with great amusement. "Gideon's a little snot faced goblin, he'd deserve it! My sisters are tolerable, but he acts like a shit even at school, so I avoid him like the plague." Logan wasn't sure if he'd get more obnoxious, or back off, but he did know he'd celebrate his beheading if it were to happen. It was refreshing, feeling like an only child, with Nick. Three siblings you didn't get along with, yet had to live with and look after, was going way too damn far. Being the spoiled favorite was fun. Logan couldn't go back, and he didn't want to go back.

Logan inhaled sharply. "I understand," he said. "I'm done. I'm done with them. Moving forward. Growing up." And breathed out, sinking into the mattress. He stared, very quietly, at the ceiling until Nick asked him about an apartment. He sat back up, then squished his cheeks, happy. "I do! I do like it, let's take it." He leaned over to kiss Nick's cheek, humming fondly. He was so giddy about moving out, paying for his first apartment, and sharing it with his dad. Logan blushed. He'd probably be saying he was living with his boyfriend, right? And he could spend more actual time with Dorian and Mia now, too. He felt so lucky. Despite the circumstances, a lot of good could come from this.

He decided, bubbly, that he should suck Nick off in the morning. Sore and exhausted now, with big sleepy blinks, but it'd be better in the morning. And he'd be even more lively from waking up with Nick, instead of back in that cold, empty house, where the people and crosses looked down on him. Before they slept, though, something occurred to Logan, a question he couldn't resist not asking. "If we're living together, does that mean I get to see your weird porn?" Logan asked, laughably earnest. "Because I bet you have better stuff than I do!"

Logan giggled. Well, that made sense of it. He'd always looked at porn from online sources, and rather awkwardly, and wasn't one to buy it. He'd lived in the Delacroix house for all his life, up until now. They weren't allowed to lock doors, and the monitoring was heavy handed, to say the least. But, he supposed that now, his horizons were really expanding. Nick probably wouldn't care if he watched porn at breakfast, over some cereal. That was hilarious to think of. Disconcerting, with what he was used to, but hilarious.

With that curiosity out of the way, the teenager hooked a leg around his dad and buried his face against the man's shoulder, passing out instantly and sleeping like a baby. He was a very tuckered out kiddo, bruised and emotionally strained, but felt safe right here, in the arms of a parent that actually wanted to look out for him. This was the place for him. He fit just right.

In the morning, groggy and warm, Logan wiggled down, lazily undoing Nick's pants and nuzzling. He only waited to let him check what the response had been. And when it was positive, that called for celebration, didn't it? Logan had fun, and despite the rush with their schedule, was very giddy about having sex with his new housemate. They were going to live together! Like family. Like lovers. He couldn't help but wonder, after the shower that left heat clinging to his skin, if this meant Nick was his boyfriend. It was a shameful, happy thought.

When Nick held his hand, he only wondered further. While one of them was trying not to be snarky, the other was bright pink and smiling, completely oblivious to anything rude or distracting the world had to offer. It couldn't get to him now.

Despite his background, the comfort in the most refined of settings, Logan displayed nothing but childish curiosity when shown around the apartment. He held onto Nick's sleeve and appeared to be peeking around him in order to investigate things, never taking the lead, somewhat shy but never avoiding the chance to take it all in. A tiny smile stuck relentlessly on his face. Was this really happening? His first apartment! Of course, it wouldn't be the first place for him to stay outside his home, but this time he'd be paying the rent. There was a significant, new and shiny sense of ownership and adult to that. Logan liked playing at being an adult.

It was small, and minimalistic, and the building smelled like cookies. When Nick shot him a nervous glance, Logan only returned it with glittery eyes. He quickly grabbed the older boy's hand again and squeezed it tight.

Logan couldn't say the explanation for why it'd been left alone bothered him, either. He was too pretty for his own good, and carried himself like someone obviously upper class, but had also been slinking around in the Underground for a few months now as a Butcher. Between a seedy neighborhood and his stepfather, Logan had no hesitation with his preferences anymore.

He nodded along to what Nick was saying, bouncing on his heels like an excited puppy, tail flicking. When turning to his dad, he was suddenly taken aback by the expression he was met with. Logan blinked once, twice, as something registered. His cheeks were back to burning red, and he had to swallow thickly for a moment. He grinned, then, digging out the cash to pay the rest of what they needed, and wrapped an arm around Nick's waist, stubbornly holding him. His head was all-- dizzy— haze of strong fondness and attraction giving that weak kneed effect again. It would've been repetitive and annoying, but it couldn't be helped, as it was hitting Logan in all the right places.

He knew Nick wouldn't do this for someone else. Wouldn't put himself out there, wouldn't be vulnerable, wouldn't check in. With any other person, it'd be casual, but Nick just didn't work like other people. Even like this. Logan could see it was a big deal, whether Nick himself would admit it or not, and it left an impression. An impression that flustered him a lot. "Thank you," he whispered, almost a squeak. A simple, but a very pointed acknowledgement. Logan hoped Nick would never think he took things like this for granted, whatever scale they came in. Not with him.