[Club] Educated Horses

ReD · Aug 25, 2015

"Oh, I'm holding my liquor fine," Lochlann said. He untangled one hand from Lonan's mane and pulled his flask from his pocket, taking another sip while they trotted around the pool. "Drinking and driving only applies to machinery."

He was going to offer some to the horse, but realized that was probably a bad idea since the horse was technically the one driving. Lochlann slumped a little; though he was still holding himself up and matching Lonan's pace, he was quite drunk and it was requiring a lot of effort.

"Pookie?" Lochlann said, echoing what he thought he heard. "What an adorable name! Who is a good boy! you are pooky! Who is going to take me to a get a pizza! You are pooky!"

He reached one hand up to scratch behind the pooka's ears. A frown crossed his face at the horse's retelling of his story.

"Uh, duh," Lochlann said. "The babes are the ones watching as you rear up majestically into the sunset while I hold the pizza. Afterwards, they flock to us, and we lead them down to the pool and they are all like 'oh no lochlann we dont have our bathing suites' and that's when we're like 'psh brah dont need no bathing suites here'. Do you follow?"

Lochlann was not sure where the horse was trying to take him, but Lochlann wanted to go get pizza, so he nudged Lonan's right flank and tangled his fingers on the right side, urging him in that direction. He didn't know if the horse would respond; Lochlann was pretty far gone.

"We don't have to go down mainstreet. We can take market if you would rather."

Sakarri · Aug 28, 2015

Lonan felt the other boy move, and shifted his weight to help him balance. He wasn't concerned for Lochlann's safety, he just wanted him to stay on longer. He still planned to throw the boy off when he was done with him.

His ears flattened as soon as he heard the word pooky. He had been called many different names before, but never one that ridiculous. He snorted in annoyance, and the feeling only grew as Lochlann gushed about him being a good boy. He was not a good boy. And he still was not taking this fool to get pizza.

Well, maybe he would if it led to skinny dipping. That would be a suitable replacement for everyone drowning, but the way Lochlann described it made Lonan want to smack his face with something. He came to a stop, and dropped his head with a loud sigh. "Yer American, aren't ye?" he asked quietly as he rubbed his face against his leg. The boy's name didn't sound American, in fact it was a word from Lonan's homeland, but he sure talked like the tourists Lonan had met.

"Oi, don't kick me, Loch Ness!" Lonan grumbled, and went to the left just to be an ass. He was not good at taking direction. He was, however, interested in seeing this drunken rambling play out, so he kept turning until he was going to the right. "If there aren't any girls after we get this pizza, I'm bringing ye up to the tallest building, and pushing ye off it," he threatened before jumping down the stairs to the parking lot. He was careful not to drop Lochlann as he landed, and then galloped through the school gates.

The trees, and the few cars on the road, became blurs as Lonan sprinted past them.

When they reached the city, he gradually slowed to a trot. "Which way is pizza?" he asked as he wandered down the side of the road. He jerked a little each time a car passed them now, both because he didn't like them, and because it was tempting to buck Lochlann off in front of them.

ReD · Sep 1, 2015

"I was," Lochlann said, in response to the American thing. "I guess, the second time."

He was drunk, or he would normally never elaborate on this, but the fact that he was talking to a horse and not a person relaxed his tongue considerably.

"I lived in Europe for a while, around the Isle of Man, Ireland, Scottland, and later Wales. My family moved to the states when I was not yet a man, which is a dumb saying but you know what I mean." Lochlann rubbed the horses's neck again. "Actually riding you reminds me of being home, Pooky woa-—'

Lochlan's words were cut off as Lonan leaped down the stairs and took off at a break neck speed. He hung on tightly, and this time Lochlann had to close his eyes because the speed and the lack of control was starting to make him feel a little...well, a little nauseous.

Pizza still sounded great though.

"If you take me to the tallest building," Lochlann slurred at him. "I'll just jump and save us both the effort."

Lochlann closed his eyes again and when he opened them, they were....someplace down town. His normally good sense of direction was not only hampered by the alcohol, but his own existential despair.

"Don't you understand?" he groaned, burrying his face into the horse's main. "The pizza is everywhere and we're just too blind to see it. This is it Pooky. I am ready to go to the roof. Life is pointless. There is only suffering."

Sakarri · Sep 5, 2015

Lonan was surprised to find out he was only half right, but that did explain the boy's name. It also made his mishearing of the word pooka a little more irritating. Anyone raised around Ireland and the UK should've at least heard of a pooka, even if they didn't believe the stories. Not being recognized hurt his pride.

At least Lochlann's despair amused him, but it was lacking compared to swimming with sexy people, or watching him fall off something. Watching him willingly jump off a building just wouldn't be the same. There would be no screaming, and no tears — well, there might be tears, but Lonan wasn't aiming for pessimistic wailing.

"Ah, now, quit yer whining," he said, sighing again. "We have those babes and pizza to look for! Actual pizza. The suffering will come after, and it'll be very entertaining."

He turned down a random street to continue the search for a pizzeria. He didn't care if Lochlann was depressed; all the talk about pizza was making him hungry, so he really did want to find some. He wondered if he could get a pizza topped with grass on this island. Surely they served weirder things.

"Right, what'll ye have on yer pizza now? I'm thinking grass, and maybe sausage."

ReD · Sep 8, 2015

After a long moment that might give the impression that Lochlann had not heard anything Lonan had said, Lochlann exhaled a long sigh.

"You are right, Pooky," he said, reaching his arm around to scratch the spot beneath the horse's chin. "Only you understand me, Pooky."

He straightened back up, or at least as much as one could straighten up while still riding bareback, but Lochlann managed. He was looking around the city while they trotted, but his head was spinning, and he was thinking more about how much pizza he could consume while jumping off a building than actually where the pizza was located.

"Grass on pizza?" Lochlann wrinkled his face. "Might as well just skip the pizza and have a salad. You know what goes great on pizza, though? Hamburger. I guess you could put lettuce on the pizza. Would that substitute Pooky?"

Lochlann waved to some girl walking by who was staring at the site of them.

"Cute, but she does not have pizza," Lochlann slurred. "Pooky, I don't remember seeing you at the stables. How come we have never done this before?"

He'd finally realized Pooky was an unfamiliar horse, but not that Lonan wasn't a regular horse at all.

Sakarri · Sep 10, 2015

The silence made Lonan curious about what was going on in Lochlann's drunk mind. He honestly wouldn't be surprised if Lochlann had just passed out, but it felt like he was still sitting upright. If he was unconscious, it'd be his wallet paying for the pizza.

Lonan's ears flicked back at the first sign of life. Apparently he was still awake. Oh well, Lonan still planned to use his money.

"Lettuce can't substitute for grass," Lonan said, sounding a bit offended. He didn't understand why people always dismissed his favorite food. "There's nothing else like it. It'd be the same as replacing yer hamburger with chicken, so it would. Even dry grass can't be compared to soft, tender grass that's had plenty of water." He was getting more hungry thinking about it.

He barely noticed the girl as they passed by her. He had a very attractive guy sitting on him, so unless she was naked, or offering to kiss him, he didn't care about her existence. He noticed a sign up ahead, though, which included the word pizza. That he did care about.

"Well, Loch Ness, I was not here before. And my name isn't Pooky, it's Lonan O'Hearn. I'm a pooka. Ye know what that is, don't ye? Yer mam should've told ye." He chuckled to himself. "Of course, ye got on me drunk, so ye must not listen to her very well."

Lonan stopped in front of the pizza place. They couldn't go in like this, but he didn't want Lochlann getting off him either.

ReD · Sep 11, 2015

"Having chicken on a pizza would also be pretty good," Lochlann responded, completely missing the point of Lonan's analogy. He had his fingers tangeled in Lonan's mane and was smelling the warm, barn-smell. For some reason, something beneath the smell made Lochlann homesick. "Wouldn't all that grass just get soggy? It doesn't sound like it'd be good."

Lochlann had no idea where they where, although that could be because had again closed his eyes and rested his face again Lonan's mane, wrapping his arms around his long neck to keep himself in place.

"Pooky, what do you mean your name isn't Pooky?" Lochlann had said before Lonan had finished. It took him a few minutes to process what Lonan was saying.

"A pooka," Lochlann said. His accent was perfect and there was a hint of recognition behind this.

"You are going to try and drown me," Lochlann said, and he could not escape the horrible irony of the situation, although he didn't give in just yet. Oh no, Lochlann knew better. He'd let Lonan take him to the water. This could be fun but first

"Oh hey, the pizza place," Lochlann said. "Lonan, Pooky, whatever your real name is, how are we going to get the pizza? One hamburger pizza and one...barnyard special, hold the clover?"

He was definitely more concerned about the pizza than the drowning.

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[Club] Educated Horses

ReD

Sex & Death Everywhere

Sakarri

Well-Known Member

ReD

Sex & Death Everywhere

Sakarri

Well-Known Member

ReD

Sex & Death Everywhere

Sakarri

Well-Known Member

ReD

Sex & Death Everywhere