Casablanca Sucked Anyway [Kait]

“Well enough,”

Well Enough was the answer Lochlann gave when someone asked him how have you been following one of his low weeks. Still, assuming well enough meant the same thing to Chloe wasn't exactly fair. She had her shit together.

"I...I know a guy, I've gotten sleeping pills from him before, if you're ever having trouble," Lochlann said. "He does the dosages for non-humans. His name is Cabel Sokot, he's easy to find."

He'd moved onto heavier stuff since then. He was aching for it now.

She turned in her chair to face him and Lochlann braced himself.

The moments of silence were becoming excruciating. He wasn't going to ask her to kill him again--he'd do that himself, in a few days, after he got his affairs in orders.

“Well… that’s not so bad, I guess…” she shrugged. “Eating his body would probably just make him mad. Nothing permanent.” She started laughing, relieved. “Hey, he might even like being eaten for all I know. I read on the internet once that's a fetish some people have.”

Lochlann didn't know how to respond. His mouth was hanging open.
Someone could say Hey Lochlann, why the long face? and he wouldn't even punch them.

"I think I'll call him later and make sure everything's okay."

It was good that she turned around because he'd have been embarrassed if she saw the way his legs gave out underneath him and he hit the floor.

Maybe it was the fever, but Lochlann swore she'd just said that this wasn't so bad.

“Uh… Lochlann?” She sounded worried again. “Are you okay?”

He didn't understand the question because he was still replaying the last thing she said over and over again in his head.

"I think I'll call him later and make sure everything's okay."

....make sure everything's okay."

...everything's okay.

Had he just gotten a second chance? Lochlann blinked up at Chloe slowly, wondering if she knew that she'd just given him a chance to have his life back. The thought was enough to floor him again but--

--he was already on the floor. How the hell did he get down here?

“...You have a fever of one hundred and one degrees,” Chloe said. “That’s…. fuck. I thought you said you weren’t sick?”

"I'm not--" Lochlann mumbled, but Chloe was too fast, and she'd rolled him onto his back and then up into her arms, carrying him like he was some kind of...of...Lochlann couldn't even think straight because maybe everything would be okay.

"Shit you weren't joking back when you said you could pick me up," Lochlann mumbled, his face scarlet. "Chloe I appreciate it but please don't do that again. I think...I think I just saw my fragile sense of masculinity disintegrate."

“You need bed-rest. Any idea why you’d be sick?”

"Chloe, really, I'm fine," Lochlann said, trying to stress the fine part. "I'm not sick, I told you, I just needed a few days off to get myself under control."

He sat back up, ignoring the dizziness and said, "I was just..I was just caught off guard. That's all. Besides, I want to make sure you're okay. I worry about you."

“Are Cabyll-Ushteys in their human forms usually this hot?”

Her hand was on his forehead and her skin felt like ice against him. If she where any other girl, Lochlann would have leaned in to kiss her, and it was almost an act of god that he didn't.

His heart was racing, but then she blushed and looked away, and Lochlann realized what she'd meant right as she said it. “Like, I mean… your temperature. Not that you’re not… you are pretty attractive, but…”


He was both relieved and disappointed.

The sensations confused him a little, mostly the disappointment. Wouldn't it be a good thing that she wasn't interested? They'd established it at their very first meeting. It kept things the same, kept her out of harm way, but he couldn't quite shut up the part of him that went, doesn't matter you still want her.

He swallowed.

"I don't know."

He might have been blushing, too, but he couldn't tell.

“101 is a really high fever for a human, Lochlann. This could be super bad. Are you completely sure that you feel okay right now?”

"I haven't felt okay for a long time, Chloe," he said, surprised that the words escaped his mouth. He shrugged, then reached up to take her hand off his forehead. He kissed it and let it go.

"But I'm fine. I can't get human colds or diseases. Something would have to be really wrong with me to get sick, and I think I'd know if something was wrong with me," he said.

Super bad sounded like it meant hospital, and there was no way Lochlann was ever going back there. He wanted the subject off of him before she could make a decision he didn't like.

"uh, Chloe...can I ask you something sort of personal?"

“…I’ll have to take your word that you’re okay, then,”

"Thank you," Lochlann said. He relaxed again, his head resting against the pillow, looking up at her while they talked. The thought struck him that he'd spent more time in bed with Chloe than any other girl and he'd never slept with her. Somehow, that felt like an accomplishment, and Lochlann found himself giving her one of his infamous grins.

Everything's okay.

“…Sure,” she said slowly. “Go ahead, ask away.”

Maybe it was the fever making him this affectionate, or maybe it was finding out that he wasn't in as dire a situation as he thought, but before he could question his decision, Lochlann sat up and pulled Chloe into a hug, his head resting on her shoulder, and closed his eyes.

Everything's okay.

"What can I do for you that would make your life better?" he asked. He'd never forgiven himself for how unfair their relationship was. He'd summoned her and she'd been there for him since.

@"Kait"

She was so close that Lochlann could feel her breath mingling with his, both tainted by the whiskey and alcohol they'd consumed earlier. His body was relaxed, but there was a sense of restrained tension as he reached up and brushed her hair away from her face.

“Um… I guess, you’re already helping me,” she said. “With these sessions, you know. Not only do they keep me alive, but they’re kinda the highlight of my week…. Aside from the time I spend with my girlfriend, of course.”

Lochlann gave her a rueful grin, grateful for the comment, because it helped yank his thoughts away from the curve of her lips.

"I'm glad," he said, quietly.

He had to remember that she was off limits. He repeated it to himself like a mantra sometimes, when he woke up alone at night and the rain was pounding on the windows.

He swallowed again. His throat was so dry lately. "Would it...would it be too much to ask if you could do me twice?"

He had his hands on her side and he looked away, out the window to the night sky.

"Not all the time...just maybe the next two weeks," Lochlann hesitated. "I know you said it's probably okay with your dad but I'm ah....I'm hungry, Chloe."

Her next comment stole some of the tension away from him again and he laughed.

“Aside from that, you’ll have to help me finish some of that pizza. You can’t just let me eat all of it.”

"I can, really," Lochlann said. "There's nothing like watching cute girl's eat to help you sleep off a bad day."

He got up and limped back over to the kitchen. He was still very unsteady, but he was doing it mostly to restore his sense of masculinity and prove that he didn't need Chloe to get it. He collapsed the moment he was back at the bed, but he put the pizza down next to him and grabbed a thin slice to make it look intentional.

Everything's okay.