Camping Trip

@"Rosetta Souline"

"Huh. Dinner. I absolutely forgot to bring dinner. Mostly because I thought I'd end up fishing and or hunting for food." Teddy pulled out from his pockets a tiny, ornate knife attached to his belt by a chain, well-worn and yet still shiny with a brass glow. "Looks like I might not get to use my brother's gift today. Yeah, probably the better idea. Wouldn't want to get blood all over the campsite and scare away other people.

A little disheartened, he went to the lakeside and said, "I'm going to go to the seas now, honey - faithfully await my return."

Then he began to fish out what little he could by throwing out his knife into the water and pulling it back by the chain to skewer any fish that would come near the surface. After some arduous minutes of only managing to catch one, he let out a frustrated grunt and leaned in closer, stabbing at the surface instead of throwing his knife. As it caught him more fish - three trout in the same time he caught the first, he ended up being in a good mood.

He picked up a twig and hung all four fish on it, bringing them back to the fire with a slow hum. "I don't care if the sun don't shine... I get my lovin' in the evening time - so I got us fish - when I'm... with my baby - okay, seriously, I'm going and asking again if you're fine with the crap I sing, cause not everyone likes ol' Dino Martini and you're going to be hearing a lot more of him if you don't stop me."

@"Rosetta Souline"

Flap.

That was unmistakably the sound of a book. Teddy's head swung as though he were a bloodhound sensing prey, and then his hair ended up in his eyes and he hunched over, one hand rubbing his invisible eyes and the other planting the fish twig on the ground. "God, that was stupid. Ow."

Clearing out his hair from his eyes, Teddy resumed his tracking of the book. He planted the twig better on the ground and shook a finger at it. "Stay."

Then he slinked over to Rosetta, placing himself over her shoulder. He would have leaned in closer to see better, but she might interpret it wrong. "What are you reading there? Also, teach me how to read."

@"Rosetta Souline"

"Can't. Busy with stuff."

"Like what?"

"Also, it's this novel called 'Goodnight Kiss.'"

"My brother was a writer. Don't think he ever mentioned anything like this. Must be new."

Teddy read along silently, and it was quickly made clear that this was not just a regular book. The dialogue and the imagery... all of it was some good material for some fun. Perhaps not in that way though.

Clearing his throat and adopting an elegant, mildly British baritone akin to that of an old Englishman, Teddy began to narrate. "He erotically licked the substance off all of her body; not missing a crevice. She let the sensation overwhelm her, every nerve firing away."

Then he changed roles as the next line in the book was spoken by the man in the narrative, not the narrator. With a bit of quick thinking, he decided to simply have a breathy, airy but deep voice, considering the situation. "I can't get enough of this taste... so intoxicating. How are you this... mmm... delicious? Oh, I don't know - maybe because of bad writing and that damned maple syrup? Seriously, are you making love to a pancake or something?"

Teddy inspected the next few lines, humming to himself and squinting every now and then. The writing wasn't too hot, but then again, he figured this was probably just a pick-me-up sort of book from the bargain bin. He nodded and then spoke up. "Next lines are all yours. I can't do both the dude and the girl, you know."

He added with a bit of curiosity as the possibility struck him, "What if people maybe started hitting on you because, you know, you read steamy books and they figured 'hey baby wanna make that a true story'? I mean, not everyone's unaware of stuff like I am."

@"Rosetta Souline"

"Aww... that's cute. But really. You can't expect to go up to a dude, buy this off him and or her - who am I to judge their gender when I can't even be sure what the hell I am exactly - and not have him or her have thoughts like that? That's one hell of a challenge in chastity, my dear."

Teddy, to his credit, didn't push any further. Though usually oblivious, he did know when to stop. Or rather, he thought it would be more fun to stop and then bring it up some other time.

Instead, he went back to his stick of fish and yanked it out of the ground, with a playful "Who's a good boy? You are - you are! Who's a dead boy? You are!"

Then the playing around took a morbid turn when he suddenly started to remove the scales of the trout and took to gutting them with his knife. "You fine with me just grilling these or do you want something fancy and not at all camp-ish?

@"Delta-Kun"

"Hey. Hey. Hey. Come here for a bit and let me put the fish on your face. They'll probably cook faster." Teddy waved a trout at Rose with a light chuckle, observing her escalation from blushing to being fully scarlet, before skewering it on a different stick and roasting it together with its companions. While the fish lay cooking atop the fire, he began digging in his pile of things. "You got salt and pep - oh, wait, never mind, found 'em."

Carefully sprinkling salt and pepper on the fish, Teddy hummed softly to himself and turned the fish over the fire. He spun his hands in circles as if wafting their aroma to himself, and then mimed throwing up. "I know I said I'd grill them but I, uh, no charcoal. No grill. Yeah, that was stupid of me."

For a few more minutes he sat there humming and turning the fish on an unstable, makeshift spit until they were roasted to imperfection, with bits somewhat charred, but most of it cooked decently. With a satisfied smile, Teddy threw the fish onto a large leaf.

Quickly, Teddy burst into a sprint out of nowhere and snatched away the unguarded novel. "Fish is ready - you want to eat, or did you want to read some more? Or maybe you want me to read to you while you eat like - ehem -"

His aloof grin instantly morphed into a serious, amorous look as he lifted the book, opened it to a random page and read aloud in a deep voice. "He picked her up and against her struggling pinned her against the bed, because even as she tried to push him away, she wanted him to do this. She wanted to lose all control and succumb to the desires - ooooookaaaa-aaaa-aaaay this is way too rape-y for me I regret this decision immediately."