One New Message [Poptart]

Hari was wide awake.

That was the thing about nerds. Them, and shady people, were the only kind of people awake at this hour. Hari was curled into a ball on his bed, watching the entirety of Anne of Green Gables' movies again with earbuds on. He would occasionally glance at Sebastian sleeping on the other bed just to assure himself he was there.

But then his phone began to vibrate. It was lost on the side of his bed, buried under his drawing tablet, sewing materials and his half-finished scarf. It vibrated three more times before he finally found it.

Wei, sweetie, are you all right?

Hari yawned, trying to process what was being said to him. Something about a monkey king being Wei's dad? He talked to him in dreams? He wanted to ask him if he was a monkey prince, but now didn't seem like the time.

That sounds like a lot of information to take in. How are you feeling? You sound... surprised? Upset?

Hari nodded. Hari thought the same way. He had told his father this, in fact, but he chose to ignore his screaming.

He wasn't in the mood to finish this movie anymore. He put his laptop to sleep and set it aside, shifting to his side and curling into a ball.

I hate my dad, too.

There were a few seconds of silence. He contemplated on a follow up to that but he really just hated his father. Every time he thought about him, he got washed over by an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. He was a demon in a cage again. He hated that. He turned to look at Sebastian's beautiful face again and tried to calm himself, telling himself that that wasn't his life anymore.

I'm going to give you a hug next time I see you.

Anyway, I don't think you owe him forgiveness or understanding for hurting you. What he did was terrible, and you are allowed to feel that it is terrible.

But I don't want you changed because of what he did. You're not your father, Wei. Strive to be better than him. That's all you can do right now, really.

I took after my dad, too. We had almost the same features and the same height now. He was quiet like me, and he was smart and he got good grades and he was good at almost anything he picked up.

He paused.

By that logic, I will inevitably become a monster.

But I'm not going to let that happen. I know where he went wrong, and I'm careful not to go down the same path.

You know where your dad went wrong. You know better than to make the same mistakes again.

You are a sweet and sensitive person, Wei. I know you'll do your best not to be like him. That's all you can do.

Hari smiled at Wei's text. Soft and warm like potato pancakes. It had a homey vibe to it, like something he'd describe his mother, so he was honored Wei felt that way about him.

I don't know. Excuses that actually excuse terrible behavior don't really exist.

I find that locating how they hurt you, and avoiding it all costs, is usually effective. Why do you hate him? Why do you think that is a good reason to hate him? When you end up exploring your feelings and answering those questions, become the opposite of it. Be the person he wasn't man enough to be.