Wear your heart on your skin in this life [C]

The girl, of course, was right, Spirit though. People got hurt every day, carrying the scars of those hurts with them in the following years until they healed. That, perhaps, was even more true for all the people, students who gathered here. William's hurt, however, at least to Spirit, still seemed greater in the end. Deep and wide as a river, it spanned over his whole life, from birth to this moment right here. The hated child, the abandoned child, the feared child... it was no wonder he could not function normal in the world.

Sighing, the wolf made himself more comfortable on the floor, lying his head down as to stop himself from shaking his head. It was no use thinking about those things. They could not be changed or fixed and people, like Lulu for example, could never understand because William would never tell, and not even because he wanted to hide what had been going on. What hurt the wolf the most was that sometimes he thought that William did not even see his wounds for what they were, for they were so big they covered his whole being.

Once again, he sighed, pushing the thoughts from his mind. There were no use from them.

''You do not need to play neither nurse nor caretaker to him'', he said then, his eyes back to the girl. ''For one thing, it would only cause his anger to become greater if you tried. For those things he cannot do himself, he has us'', stopping there for a moment, Spirit thought about what he wanted to say next. ''And while you should not let him push you around, some grace would probably serve both of you best. Getting into his face about things right now wouldn't do any good.''

''His at his angriest right now'', he tried to explain without giving away too much information. ''At his most hurt, and while he won't exactly get any better in terms of his temper when the hurt finally passes, he will get less angry. Less...'' <i>violent</i> Spirit thought, but never said.

''We know what we know and he knows what he knows. We cannot read his mind nor he ours'', Spirit answered the girl's next question. It was safe enough and he didn't want her thinking what he guessed she was thinking now.

Nodding his head, Warrior accepted the cream Lulu had given him in silence. He had already spoken once today and that was unusual for him in itself. The room fell into silence lasting over the hours to come. While it lasted, William dreamed.

<i>He dreamed of darkness welling up under his skin, of the feeling of such anger that he could no longer breath, think, or see; of fear that this woman would turn out stronger than him taking away the one thing he loved in this bleak, painful life. He remembered screaming...and waking up to house destroyed and blood, blood, blood...</i>

He didn't even have the time scream in waking world before Spirit was already by his side. Grabbing onto the wolf, he almost fell off his bed as he put all the strength of his body into not crying as the pain grew ten times worse as he shook.

For a long moment, William forgot he was not alone in the room, alone with Spirit, and Warrior, in a place which would allow him time to confront his pain, to ride it through until it was gone like he did before, with Spirit's words a constant reminder that he was there, that William wasn't (<i>yet</i> something strange and bitter and darker than black whispered from the depths of his mind) lost in his own darkness. He forgot about a room-mate, a frail girl who already got on his nerves as he found himself faced with a choice: he could not hold back both his tears and his pain-he only had enough strength to hold back one. And he would not cry. He WOULD NOT CRY. But then he would scream...

Just as he was about to break, however, just as the first syllable of an ear piercing scream broke through his tight-sealed lips, something cold and healing touched the hot, red skin of his back. He sighed in relief. ''Thank you, Warrior'', he whispered, his voice broken and dry, his tears obvious even if he had managed not to cry. ''Do not thank me'', he silver-haired man offered as his hands slowly covered the whole expanse of William's self inflicted wound (for what else does one call a thing one inflicts on his own skin in a fit of desperate rage knowing it would cause him long lasting pain?). ''It is the girl.''

There, William finally remembers his room-mate, an unfortunate witness to this whole affair; unfortunate, because he can already feel the black tendrils of anger rising within his skin as he thinks about her seeing him like this, weak, pathetic, broken... He raises his head in anger, ready to speak in hate... and falls back down in pain.

''Apologies'', Warrior mutters, returning to slowly rubbing his back, as if he's mistake was not intentional. William forgives him instantly, even though he knows it was. He is kind of afraid of black right now, after dreaming about it welling up under his own skin.

''You really should keep it covered'', Spirit says, eyeing the black symbols now gleaming in the low light because of the cream rubbed into the skin, his lips curling in disgust even as he eyes the one meant to represent him.

''It feel off'', William mutters in response, finally letting go off Spirit, but only for a moment as he tries to find a more comfortable position. As he does so, he bites on his tongue in pain and eyes his room-mate. He knows he should say thanks. He does not want to. He lets Warrior do it for him. The usually silent spirit puts the given cream back into a box and then stands back up to hand it back to the girl.

''Thank you'', he says while William's eyes rest on Lulu's form, which is currently buried in pillows and a blanket. It would be him saying that right now, it really would, if only he was not rendered physical unable to express thanks after all these years which he had suffered in hate. ''It has been most welcomed help.''

Warrior nods his head at Lulu's words, making sure to note where the girl had put what seemed as the only cure for William's pain, and the bad mood connected to it. The guy who had done William's tattoo had given told and given them all sorts of things, most of which Spirit had remembered for both of them, but nothing had seemed to work so far. It had made Warrior wonder if perhaps the pain the boy was suffering through so badly was coming from his mind rather than from the irritation of his back. He wasn't sure whether the fact that William was now feeling better spoke in favour or against that particular theory.

And the boy was feeling better. His back still hurt slightly, but for a moment, it did not make him want to actually scream from it. His dreams, however, might still do that, which meant that he was thus actually glad that his body seemed to reject the idea of sleep now that he didn't actually need to be unconscious in order to be able to breath properly. As he made himself more comfortable on the bed, William thought about what he was supposed to do now, considering that he was awake, in his room, with two spirits and a person, with zero interest in doing things like reading. His laptop might have been an option, but it was either empty, for he hadn't charged it in days, or destroyed in a fit of rage. He could not remember clearly whether or not it was on the list of things he had broken since coming here. He moved again, suddenly restless, still wincing slightly in pain.

''Honestly'', Spirit muttered, having spent the last few minutes watching him carefully, as he had spent all the other minutes before. He had not meant for William to hear him, but by the way the boy's body had immediately tensed after he had spoken he knew he did still.

''Honestly what?'', William asked through clenched teeth, expecting to finally receive the lecture he thought he would get as soon as he entered the tattoo place, yet did not.

''Nothing'', the wolf answered, shaking his head. ''Rest.''

''I'm rested'', he boy answered, his beck tensing even more, the skin there surely getting even more irritated. William however did not seem to notice this time around. He was staring at Spirit instead, with fire in his eyes, and that, along with the scar that was original birthmark which he knew was under the tattoo still and he sometimes thought he could still see despite the black ink stopped him from saying 'I honestly don't understand'. Because he did. He did.

But he also didn't. And William seemed instinctively sense the moment in which the understanding had finally been overshadowed by not understanding.

''I'm going out'', the boy said, getting up, seemingly not in pain any more all of a sudden, though both spirits knew he was, just not as much as before. He was out of bed in seconds, heading for the door still half-naked and barefoot, yet not caring about that. The swirling lines of symbols meant to represent Creation, Destruction, Attack and Defence in a way not even Spirit and Warrior could completely understand looked haunting in the low light now that he was up and almost normally walking. William was almost out through the door before he stopped. He then turned slowly towards his room-mate. Squinting his eyes at her, he seemed to think about something for a second, before he suddenly stormed back towards her, plucking her headphones from her ears in one fluid move.

''I'm going out'', he repeated. ''Do you need anything?'', his voice was gruff, but not as angry as before. It was the closest he was going to get to nice, probably ever.

((OOC-I apologize for a long post, I was trying to write myself out of this 'they have no point of contact situation'. This was all I came up with)))

William groaned silently at the girl's reply. The whole point of him offering to get something for her was so that she wouldn't have to bother. It was his way of saying thanks once again, this time not through Warrior's words, as well as a way to stay out as long as he could with a good excuse, following the logic that the more stuff he had to pick up the longer he would be out, because staying out just for the sake of being away from Spirit and Warrior was childish, especially considering he was still in pain, though light, and he refused to be seen as childish. And the girl just had to ruin his plans, offering to go with him instead of just telling him what to bring back.

''I'm going out'', he repeated once more, letting go of her earphones, and stepping back. ''What I bring back will depend on my mood. If you wish to follow me... Well, I guess I can't stop you.'' He could. He could stop her in a million and one way before she even left the bed. He still needed to say, show, thanks, so he controlled himself and left it at what he had already said. Both Spirit and Warrior knew why he was truly going out, but neither said anything, content for now to watch William speak with another human being willingly. They, or at least Spirit, could not say anything yet that wouldn't make William even more angry, and have thus opted for silence and observation.

''One boring drink it is'', the boy said in answer to the quiet girl's request, nodding his head slowly in acknowledgement before allowing the door to close loudly behind him. Once outside, he finally allowed himself to stop and wince at the horrible pain spreading through his body. His beck still hurt, and now that he was moving even the small relief which the cream Lulu had given Warrior had brought him was all but gone. Still, despite all of it, he refused to give up now and return, still filled with anger and a slightly different hurt brought not so much by Spirit's words as it was by his behaviour. He had known that the wolf was going to give him a lecture about the tattoo at some point. Knowing it, however, and sitting down quietly through receiving it, when the person giving you an earful was the one of the two beings in the whole universe who knew and should be able to understand why you are hurting were two completely different things.

Thus, William had gone out, ignoring the wending machine at his floor and going down instead, all the way to the kitchen and living room space that all of the high school students staying in the dorm shared. On his way down he got more than a handful of strange looks, some directed at his back, some at bare feet and otherwise messy appearance. For now, however, he decided to do nothing about it. His beck hurt from just walking, and slowly at that, he could not imagine what kind of torture he would be put through if he decided to fight somebody now, but he remembered faces, male and female both, both younger and older, and promising himself that next time he would do something about it. For now though, he would just grab the quiet girl's quiet drink, and as much food as he could carry for himself.

''Here'', he said, throwing the drink at his unsuspecting room-mate before he had even properly entered the room, once he had returned some half an hour ago, because that's how much time it took to get down to the first floor make himself enough food to last for the next couple of days, because he wasn't planning on repeating that trip any time soon, not with his back like this, and he doubted any of the other occupants of the room would be in the mood to bring him food especially considering the mood his earlier exit had set. Glancing quickly at both Spirit and Warrior he noted they had not moved. He doubted they had even spoke. Suddenly angry all over again because of, well, everything that has ever happened to him, William made himself sit at what was supposed to be his desk instead of lying beck in bed. Once there, he dug into one of the sandwiches he had brought with himself.