Shook to the core

Ephemral

Ephemral

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John actually had to think before he answered. Had he ever seen the face of god. This answer should have been blatantly obvious to him...

"No....... But that doesn't mean anything"

John looked down into his food, obviously not satisfied with his answer. John honestly partially wanted to be validated for his last statement in a almost perverse way. Of course he didn't want to be guilty of blaspheming, but he was conflicted because he was convinced that he had committed a horrid sin. One type of sin that had been forbidden since the beginning.

@Romi
 
Romi

Romi

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Of course he'd say no. If he had, the conversation would have been over a long while ago. He'd have started that.

"You've been mistaught the nature of eternal sin. An eternal sin is eternal because it rejects God in his totality. You didn't sin against god when you 'agreed' to the experiment. You don't sin against God when you use it. But you do sin against God right now, when you say that your sin is so grand that even God himself cannot forgive it."

Angelo fixed him with a hard look.

"To reject God's mercy is a sin. Is that a sin you want to continue? The gates of forgiveness remain open to anyone who turns away from sin."

 
Ephemral

Ephemral

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John sat there a bit with the dead stare in his eyes and sat there with a confused look on his face. He was committing a sin right now? John didn't know how to answer so he said the first thing on his mind.

"I dont plan to reject the forgiveness of God, but I also don't know if a person like me is worthy or even capable to worship God. Each day I had been taught never to blaspheme, never to go against God's will, and never to have to ask for forgiveness from him. This was the best way to stay pure in the eyes of God I was told. Each one of my days was spent reading the bible along with my other readings. You have to understand that I cannot forgive myself even though God may."

@Romi
 
Romi

Romi

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Angelo felt like he'd shoved a doorstop in John's thinking, and now all he had to do was really wedge his foot right in there.

"God's capacity for mercy is infinite. Anyone, no matter what, is capable of it. All humans are born with sin, and all humans are drawn to sin. What matters isn't whether or not we sin, it's whether or not we repent afterwards. You should find a church on the island, one that can correct some of the things you've been taught. One that can point you towards a healthier relationship with God, rather than one that's... like this. You're beating yourself up for something that everyone--even God--understands. Humans make mistakes. It's what we do. But what you did wasn't even a mistake. You were a child, and you had no one to protect you. It was a hard time, but you need to accept that it wasn't your fault."

John was still a child, but maybe it wasn't best to point that out right then.

 
Ephemral

Ephemral

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John looked down from Angelo, his religious doubt was mostly pushed away because the seemingly sage words that were said to him. But a second wave of a different emotion started to appear in his mind and it wouldn't go away any time soon. It was nothing like the religion fueled hate for himself or his power. It was something that came as a result of his captivity. On one hand he had indeed shed tears because of his ability's conjunction to his stress hormones, but he had never actually dwelt on his captivity because of his propensity to blame himself and his blasphemy, not blame the people who caused him the pain in the first place.

"I'll keep that in mind Angelo. Thank you."

John scooted back in his chair and prepared to go to the roof to start to deal with the emotional wave that he had just been hit by. Though he would leave, he would not leave before he thanked Angelo here.

"Angelo, thank you. I have no means to thank you with but I feel quite indebted to you. You are the person who has shown me a path to follow. I can't ever repay you for that, but if you ever need my help all you have to do is think it and consider it done."
 
Romi

Romi

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Well, he'd definitely made a change, but maybe not the one he'd been aiming for. He'd hoped that John would take firm action with regards to the Yuna situation, ideally getting told formally to leave him alone. Angelo doubted he was going to, though. He seemed intent on dealing with it himself--an option he might not get, if Yuna mouthed off any longer.

"You don't need to worry about returning the favor or anything," Angelo said. "I was doing my job. And my... spiritual job? I don't know. It bothers me when I see people beating themselves up out of religious guilt in a religion that's supposed to be about forgiveness."

He wasn't going to go after John, but he was going to leave around the same time, getting up shortly after John did.

"Have a good day, John."

He'd wait for John to leave before he left himself, heading back to the station to make his report.

@Ephemral - fin
 
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