Private Lo, they do call to me

It had been gnawing at Hella for ages. The question of what her death would bring. She knew the day she would die - Hella had long since learned to suppress the thought. But every once in a while it cropped up. The very minute she would die.

But that didn't scare her. She could always die before her Dying Day, but the question that burned in her brain was where her soul would find itself. Would she join her brothers and her father in Valhalla? Her mother in Folkvangr? Would she be alone in Hel?

It had eluded her for a long time. But she had a potential source of information on that front: Sylvi Thorsblood. A Valkyrie living on Manta Carlos. If she could just get her alone and talk to her...

Hella sat outside the cafe she'd chosen for the meeting spot. She hadn't actually confirmed whether Sylvi would show up or not. But she had a feeling that a letter sent by a surprisingly durable rabbit plushie with pink bows on its ears was curious enough to get anyone to come see what was going on.

She sipped the black coffee that she had, still tasting nothing but rainwater when she drank it. Hot rainwater, which was somehow less pleasant than it sounded. But the warmth staved off the cold air, and that was enough.

The wait for Sylvi wasn't really anything Hella couldn't handle. She smiled politely when she heard her name called, opening her eyes to look at the Valkyrie. Back when she had been younger, Sylvi had been the ideal she had wanted for herself: strong, feminine, blonde. Her own oak brown braids felt bland by comparison, but even Sylvi's golden hair seemed inadequate now compared to what she had had before.

"I did, yes. I know that my method of contacting you was unconventional, but I had no way of knowing where you were. And I do have responsibilities of my own. Hopefully Magnhild didn't give you any trouble. She is one of my more mild Einherjar, so I thought she was best suited to the task."

Careful not to apologize to the Valkyrie, even knowing she wasn't a Fae by any stretch, Hella explained what she assumed was a question on the other woman's mind before continuing, "Would you like something to drink? It's the least I can do for asking you out here."

"It's a bit of a misnomer, I'll admit," Hella said, stirring her own tea to even out the temperature when she realized that the top of the drink had begun to cool slightly. It was strange how sensitive to temperature she had become with the loss of her ability to taste.

"They are not the noble dead, no. Each of my stuffies has a small sliver of my own soul sewn into them. But they are strong, durable, and on the off chance one of them is destroyed they return to my side at the next dawn. So I thought it an appropriate name."

But Sylvi wanted to get down to business, and Hella couldn't agree more. Pushing her drink to the side, she clasped her hands together and looked the Valkyrie dead in the eyes.

"Fair enough; I will be blunt then. My life has been a string of drastic changes: I was not born the way you see me now, in any sense," she began, holding up a hand and letting her draconic scales begin to grow down her arm.

"I don't fear death; I am keenly aware of my dying day. But I do not know what will become of me beyond that. I would love nothing more than to see my father, my mother, and my brothers again..."

Hella hesitated. She hoped that her meaning was coming across well enough. The words that she left unsaid, that she feared for her own destiny and where her Hugr might go when she died.

"Of course, I have nothing to hide. But I understand that you may not be able to adequately answer my questions to my satisfaction."

Hella shifted in her seat, straightening her shoulders and waited for the questions that Slyvi intended to ask. She had a few ideas of what they might be, but making assumptions was never a good thing and she didn't want to necessarily reveal more information than she had to.

"I was born a human and assigned male at birth," Hella began, folding her hands neatly together on the table and locking eyes with Sylvi. She had nothing to hide, as much as the answers that the truth might give frightened her. She continued, "and I have spent my entire adult life fighting to become what I want and keep what is mine."

Taking a deep breath, Hella clenched her hands together tighter as a red mist rolled out of her mouth, smelling faintly of iron. She started from the beginning, sparing Sylvi the gorier details but not leaving out the murder she was coerced into or the times she attempted to take her life, or the retaliatory war she waged against the Elves.

"And my most recent accomplishment was separating my girlfriend from the monstrosity that had taken hold of her. I even gave her my heart, quite literally, to bring her back from the brink of death when I cut too deeply."