About family. The idea made her want to give a bitter bark of laughter. Family. What a word. It gave both comfort and hatred. Shay was overtaken by all the different sensations. She had a family, so why did she feel like they weren't half the time?
"No, that wouldn't be enough. You could believe that right now, but it might change later. Words just aren't....." she paused and breathed out slowly, stepping back from the hug now, "they aren't enough. Not anymore."
Shay rubbed at her arm, thought to herself for a good five minutes. She closed her eyes, hand clenched into a fist and shaking just barely at her side. For those who could read body language, the resentment and anguish were clear by the look in her eyes when she opened them and the steely tone of her voice.
"I have a favor. That stuff I told you? About..." she gulped. "Me. About what happened to me. You can tell who you gotta tell. Can tell who did it. But beyond that, I want you to let his name die. Don't speak it. Don't give him that. The rumors, don't listen to them."
Shay felt a fire in her throat, such an intense hatred she wasn't even sure a human was capable of handling it. But she could. It mixed with that determination, the current of strange hopeful feelings that arced around her and pushed at other people.
"He wanted to be a big shot. He wanted his name to live on. Wanted to be the best. The scariest. But he doesn't get that. He gets a quiet death, and in a month, no one remembers his name or the things he did. He doesn't get to go down in history. He doesn't get to impact my or anyone else's life. Not like he wanted to."
♠♠♠
- Jun 18, 2015
- 10,109
- Gender
- Female
- Pronouns
- She/Her
- Posting Status
- Irregularly
Angelo let Shay have her time. He let her stew on whatever she was thinking of, thinking of his own stuff in turn. He had a lot to think about, but honestly he found it hard to do with someone else so close at hand. She might want to continue the conversation at any moment, and in the end his head just went in circles, over and over until she finally did want to talk.
To ask him to drop it. To let him die.
"We'll look into it," Angelo said, even though it wasn't really a we. The butcher had killed the girl he was adopting--he wouldn't be touching the case with a twenty foot poll. Too close to the subject matter. Too close to the victims. "There's a lot of unanswered questions. A lot of big holes. How'd it happen? That's stuff we have to know--we have to dig around and figure out where he went, who was helping him. You can't do this sort of thing by yourself. But it'll stay out of the papers. The police aren't going to want to publicize this sort of thing anyway. Not when there's probably a million ways we could have caught him. But he's not going to have his name in lights, I can tell you that much. The only thing he's going to be impacting is MCPD policies about the handling of bodies.
To ask him to drop it. To let him die.
"We'll look into it," Angelo said, even though it wasn't really a we. The butcher had killed the girl he was adopting--he wouldn't be touching the case with a twenty foot poll. Too close to the subject matter. Too close to the victims. "There's a lot of unanswered questions. A lot of big holes. How'd it happen? That's stuff we have to know--we have to dig around and figure out where he went, who was helping him. You can't do this sort of thing by yourself. But it'll stay out of the papers. The police aren't going to want to publicize this sort of thing anyway. Not when there's probably a million ways we could have caught him. But he's not going to have his name in lights, I can tell you that much. The only thing he's going to be impacting is MCPD policies about the handling of bodies.
Shay's look leveled. "I don't care if the police make their reports. But nothing in the public eye. Don't ever look at the stupid things he did and think they were terrifying. They weren't. He's not. He's pitiful."
Shay balled his shirt in her fists and rested her forehead against him, breathing slowly to quell the rage and pain. She closed her eyes and rolled her head as if to pressurize a headache away, before laughing to herself. A laugh without humor or emotion.
"Stupid, silly monsters," she muttered to herself before pulling back and rubbing her eyes.
"Thank you. Really. Thank you for everything. It won't be easy. I won't be easy. None of it will. Not when the anger settles in."
Shay sighed. "I need to rest."
And with that, unceremoniously left.
♠♠♠