Private Getting Away for a Bit

Jasmine was on cloud nine, kicking her feet gently in the water as she devoured her sandwich. The first half was gone in no time at all, and she realized that she was acting like she was starving. So she slowed down with the second half.

"It's so good. Dad and I used to do peanut butter on saltine crackers. We'd share a spoon and just sit around the dining room table, talking for hours about whatever was on our minds. Grab a cracker, spread some peanut butter on it, and pass the spoon."

She smiled softly at the memory, then tore off a little corner of her sandwich to drop into the water. She watched it float away, almost like she was hoping it would somehow reach her house in Raven's Grove and let her dad know that she was okay. She leaned against Aria absentmindedly, resting her head against her shoulder.

"I'm glad you asked me out here this weekend. I really just. Needed to get away for a bit. Before I move out of the dorms."

"It is," Jasmine admitted as she pulled herself closer to Aria. She felt safe, and Jasmine was in a good enough place to just let this happen without overthinking it too much. "I'm glad you invited me along... I don't have any hard feeling about the break up with Eric but we needed space after and it's been a little lonely in the dorm. Part of why I'm moving in with Sargeant Genovese, actually."

With nowhere better to put her hand, Jazz placed it on the valley where their legs touched, kicking her own feet to splash water back on Aria's ankles. "I used to think that the absolute mountain of stress that I was under was normal - I heard all the time from successful people that feeling overwhelmed was normal and that if you just worked harder... just pushed through it... it'd get better and you'd succeed where everyone else failed."

She let out a small laugh, glancing with her eyes at the wrapped up half a sandwich without comment.

"I'd never ask you to," Jasmine said almost mechanically at Aria's admission that she couldn't move mountains, assuming that she was talking about helping Jasmine with her own stress. "I don't have nearly the expectations here that I did back home. I thought I still had to live up to them but... I kinda feel like I can just let a lot of that go now."

"I don't know what I want to do... there's a lot, you know? I can't be the first woman president anymore," Jasmine looked up at Aria with a small, joking smile. "I almost think I'd prefer something... I dunno. Simple? Domestic. Leave the big achievements to other people and just try to be happy with whatever happiness I can carve out for myself.

Which was all well and good to say, but way easier said than done. Jasmine knew that; knew how she was at her core. But saying the words out loud at least made it feel real. And maybe Aria would hold her to that.

The hand squeezing her shoulder felt nice. Really nice, actually. She hadn't been held like this... ever, really. Eric had hugged her and held her before, but in hindsight she realized that he'd always maybe held back a little. Which made sense, of course: she wasn't what he'd wanted.

"Ah, no I'm full enough for now. We can save it for later though. Oh! If we've got foil we can put it in the coals later. Kinda toast it up. That'd be good."

Jasmine could feel her cheeks growing a bit warmer at the compliment, and she pulled herself closer to Aria in response. "I, ah... thanks. It does feel nice. Like I'm not putting on a show or anything. Just... actually being happy."

"You're right about that," Jasmine said after a moment of silence. She laughed, but it was more just letting air out through her mouth faster than normal. "I am a planner, and it's gotten me out of trouble at least as much as it's gotten me into it."

"Maybe I just... I dunno. Need to be more spontaneous. Flexible. There's a small part of me that keeps waiting for... ah, I dunno. The rug to get pulled out from underneath me? Like this is all temporary. I know that's the..." she struggled to say the word, her nose wrinkling slightly with it, "...depression talking, but that's what I lived with for most of my life."

"I still think it's a little scary," Jasmine admitted, deliberately taking Aria's hand in her own and tracing the outline of her knuckles with her thumb. "That my brain is just... naturally messed up and that if I hadn't come here I probably never would have gotten help. Not real help, I mean."

Aria's question though threw her off, and she sputtered just a bit as she fumbled through her thoughts to try and think of something. There was a distinctly weird quirk about being put on the spot. About knowing the answer to a question until someone asked you what it was. And Jasmine let out a short, breathy laugh - not quite nervous but not entirely comfortable either.

"Ah that's... I mean I guess if I had to think of anything, ah..." Jasmine looked around then back at Aria and her eyes fell on her face - her eyes, her nose, her lips. So she said the second thing that came to mind that they could do, the thought put in her head by the water lapping at her toes.

"Ah, go swimming maybe? There's lakes and ponds all over the island, right? There's gotta be one nearby. Or at least like. A deeper, slower part of the river."