First Session: Kalik

Bloos

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"I don't...." Kalik frowned and started rubbing his head. He let out a weak laugh. The beginning? There was a beginning but he didn't remember it. Even after everything they never really came back. "I don't remember fully. Just bits....like a uncomplete puzzle with missing pieces."

They were gone. Kofi made sure of that.
The things he did remember also weren't really something trust worthy. They messed with his mind, removed and tweaked things, conditioned him. "Missing pieces to a tainted puzzled."
 
Romi

Romi

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How many times could Valli think to himself oh dear in the span of a few minutes? A lot, apparently.

"Amnesia," Valli said. "Whether entirely psychological, or due to brain damage. It's probably not something you'd like, but have you spoken to a doctor about it...?"

He was guessing no.
 
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"You think I haven't spoken to a doctor? I have and they didn't really help."

It wasn't amnesia? Does he really have amnesia? That would imply he could possibly get the memories back, that they could fix the puzzle. Kalik didn't think he should mention the fact that he had tried to get them back via another way, mostly because it was a fail. "And what happens if I can't get them back? What happens if I get them back and...things don't go back to they way they were?"
 
Romi

Romi

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Ah. This, at least, was familiar territory. He wasn't the first person to come to Valli because of memory issues.

"No matter what, we always move forward. Even if we don't want to. Restoring your memories won't make you how you were. It'll make you who you are, with your old memories. If you're aiming to turn back time, you'll always be disappointed, so it's important to set realistic goals. Having your old memories might help you reconnect, but it won't turn back the clock. It's a worthy goal, but it isn't a miracle cure."
 
Bloos

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"S-so you suggest moving forward then? With or without my old memories?" Kalik sat there thinking it over. Even if he didn't want to move forward it would probably be better if he did. Still he had stuff that needed to be handled before he could do that....or maybe he could let someone else handle it.

Kalik rubbed one of his arms as he eyed Valli. "How did you move forward exactly? How are you so...." Kalik wasn't sure on what to call Valli. Valli just seemed.... "Are you happy?"
 
Romi

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Was he happy? Valli didn't usually talk much about his own stuff, but in this case...

Well, it wasn't a standard session for sure.

"Yes," he said. "When I escaped, I thought I would never be happy again. I thought I was... ruined, I guess? tainted by what had happened. I spent a lot of time trying to make myself the way I'd been before, and then eventually I realized that I would never be that person again. I'd changed, and I had to accept that. So I managed to move on. I cut ties with most of the people from before, because being around them was too painful. I gathered new friends. I found a new career. I found new people to share my life with. And now yes, I'm happy. I think my work helps people. I have someone I love. It's.. satisfying."
 
Bloos

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"That's good." That means he had a chance too right? Valli made it seemed like he did. Kofi was saying otherwise which was getting annoying to hear.

"So it shouldn't be that hard to move on then? I don't..." Kalik glanced over beside him, looking a bit annoyed more than anything. "I'm not really even sure if I have anything to go back to anyways. He took that all away and the little left I had....I um ....abandoned it because I didn't want them to abandon me first."
 
Romi

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"I didn't say it wouldn't be hard," He didn't want to give him any sort of false impression. "I simply said it was possible. To move on. To move past."

It was too easy for trauma to become a central part of your life, a post that you tied yourself to.

Valli didn't miss that he kept looking to the side.

"I think your first steps would be handling the physical side of things. Ruling out physical causes, magical causes, things like that. Once you do that, you can decide how you want to move forward."
 
Bloos

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Kalik sighed a very long sigh. He knew at least one of the causes but there was still other factors for why his memory was still fucked up. "My memories were removed...a few important ones anyway. The rest are..." Kalik held his head and frowned.

"I'm not sure on what to trust sometimes. I sometimes remember things but they may be also false memories. I can't remember the things I want to and the things I do remember are the things I don't want to." Kalik started to feel more uncomfortable. Everytime he tried to remember something it would just be replaced with what happened to him when he was kidnapped.
Other memories seemed to be adjusted or tweaked in other ways.

"If you have any ideas on how to fix that then please tell me..."
 
Romi

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This was not a basic problem. This was an expert probably that required an expert's solutions.

"There are people on the island who can sort through... things like this. Memory damage. Who can peel through your memories and help you sort them out. The ones that were damaged. The ones that were erased. The ones that were implanted. Getting to the bottom of that seems like a... significant first step. A way for you to start to move forward. Before you can rebuild, you need to know how bad the damage is."
 
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