fate is both a prison and an open hand (CD)

Sebastian was not a planner. In fact, he took great pride, in those few cases that he cared to remember anything about his life, whether it concerned his past, present, or future, that he had not planned a single thing in his life. Even the few birthday and otherwise parties he had been host for in high school had been, though lavish, loud and exquisite, thought up on the spot, for the most part. The other parts, the one where one had to think about food, paying and other human, worldly things had been taken off his hands as soon as they reached them, sometimes even before, and done by somebody else in a quiet understanding that it was simply better like that for everyone involved, maybe even the world in large.

Even his absences from classes and procrastination, which had became so chronic at this point that he was no longer sure it still classified as simply procrastination, no matter hoe deliberate they may seem, were not, in fact, planned. He simply happened to be a victim of a terrible urge which every human being experienced at least once or twice a month more frequently. Like, for every day of every month in the last few years. The urge itself consisted of wanting to stay in bed that day because getting up was simply too hard and wasn't really worth it in the end. Lately, however, he found himself unable to give in to that urge, because Hari <i>was</i> a planner and Sebastian had quite taken to waking up Hari still in his bed, his whole body still wrapped all around the other man's as he tried to take all of his heat to himself. It was his favourite time of the day. The only thing that could and would make it better, he thought as he found himself being dragged from his sleep by his lover yet again, would be if it were the only thing that happened throughout the whole day.

It wasn't, however, and by the looks of things, the day on which he would somehow manage to convince Hari to actually give in to his demands of the whole day of sex was still a long way away. Thus, he got up every morning, sleepy and almost completely listless, only to laugh at Hari's expression, at how serious he took the world and whatever he found to be his duty for the day. He laughed, but not in mocking, but with real mirth in his eyes, a feeling being born in his chest each time he would lay eyes on the man, which made him listen attentively to silly things spoken in the dark of the night, during those few moments when they were both exhausted from having just come, yet still to awake to actually sleep, and share fries with a lazy smirk on his face as he fed them to the other man, licking his fingers seductively once they were done. The feeling which made him look at the world, and not be bored, though Hari still claimed he was as stubborn as a mule about being a slot or something like that, which in truth he was. He was no more interested in the classes he took today than he was a week ago, no more interested in the world in general, but now he at least actually spent his days in the said classes, made to attend them by his lover, thinking about said lover, and for him that was something. Something special.

Which was also why he so dreaded the date with which Hari kept threatening him. An actually date which would actually take place somewhere in the open, where they would quite possibly be surrounded by other people, instead of consisting of simply taking the food Hari had made for them into their room, would mean that they would most probably mean that they would have to talk, and there were just so many more pleasurable things to do with one's mouth than talk. It was such a waste of time to talk, in his opinion at least, for he did not see the point of a compulsive need to define anything that was, is, or would be between them. They were together, and it was special. It made him feel for his lover, which was what Hari was to him; a man with whom he slept, to whom he came back to if he actually managed to leave his room that day. Someone to hold at night and wake up to until such time that one of both of them wouldn't want to do so any more. Why did it need to be anything more than that? It was not love in the grandest of its forms, yes, but such love did not exist anyway, and this, this was gentle, and easy, and fun and he <i>wanted to keep it</i> and keeping it was in his mind directly opposite to talking about it.

Thus, he had conveniently managed to forget about the dreaded date the minute Hari had told him about it, remembering it only when Hari still wasn't in bed somewhere around one in the morning the day before, and then forgetting about it again once he actually managed to fall asleep while alone, which was why his lover was met with an angry, irritated look the next morning when he tried to wake him.

''No'', he said promptly, burring his face back into the pillow. ''It is not date or any other day'', he added, taking a quick look to his bed-side clock. ''It is...nine in the morning. That, my dead lover boy, is still night.'' With that, he desperately tried to actually fall back asleep.

( @"Poptart" never apologize about the length of a post, it is a perfect post :D I am, however, sorry if my post is all over the place, I tried to make it an opposite to Hari's as well as a reply at the same time and maybe my thoughts seem a bit all over the place because of that. Also, I feel I should add that Sebastian may or may not be above turning into a snake to get out of this date at this point xD Though, that probably warrants a PM of its own xD)

After merely a week or so, Sebastian thought as Hari dragged his fingers through the soft hair at the nape of his neck, a kiss he had landed under his ear still burning slightly against his skin, making his blood run faster towards a certain part of his body, which in turn decided that maybe it should wake up and take <i>some</i> notice, he certainly knew more than well which buttons he was to push in order to drag his lover out of bed. And that, he groaned, is a thought that should have never been thought. Lovers are for being dragged into beds, not out of them.

However, after a week or so of being woken by Hari every morning, Sebastian also knew that the man would not, in fact, let him have his round of morning sex which was sure to wake him up, at least before it put him back asleep again. Thus, he proper himself on his elbows, glaring at Hari through the messy vale currently between them which was his hair. ''Lover boy'' he asked as he did so, trying not to yawn so he did not ruin his point ''when are you going to learn that most people can suck it for all that I care?'' Having said that, Sebastian let himself fall back to bed, though this time he was laying on his back instead of his stomach, and that, in fact, was a regular part of the reality show called getting Sebastian out of his bed.

''How can I be sore, lover'', he asked then, a slight smirk on his face as he turned to the side to look Hari in the eyes, ''without having had you in my bed? That kind of sex usually asks for two people to be present, you know'', he joked as Hari threatened to, at least he so assumed, physically drag him out of bed. Sebastian sighed.

''Why does this mean so much to you?'', he asked, as he finally got himself in a sitting position, dragging his fingers through his hair. He was still looking sideways, at Hari, as he thought quietly about the dreaded date day. Dreaded date day. Ha. Try saying that three times fast.

''Fine'', he muttered under his breath as he got out of bed and headed for the bathroom, still very much naked as he had fallen asleep last night while waiting for Hari to return to bed. ''I'm up. And not in the good way.''

Once he was inside the bathroom, hidden from view by the door no matter how thing it was , and how bad at blocking out the sound, Sebastian leaned heavily against the sink, closing his eyes once more as he fought against that not so small part of himself which yearned to make itself small, to curl up on itself and assume the shape in which this whole charade would be impossible simply because of his shape. Snakes, after all, could not be goaded into talking by pushing just the right buttons simply because they could not talk as such. It was a defence mechanism, a built in escape route, but not the one he was willing to take. He hated his snake form with passion, hated the way in which he was <i>stuck</i> as such with no say in that when he was going to turn back, the way in which if not careful, he would have to be that way for a <i>month</i> until the sky saw fit to grace the world, and himself, with a full moon once again. No, he would not turn into a snake if he could stop it, not for anything in the world.

And besides, turning now would mean that all that incredibly food Hari had made would also go to waste, and that was something he did not wish to see happen either, even though he would much rather eat the food <i>here</i>, where there were beds and privacy to play with said food in a select few, fairly creative manners before actually committing to eating it all. Sighing once more, Sebastian finally pushed those thoughts aside, and his snake half <i>down</i>, deep, deep down, deeper than even his Seduction power, and grabbed for his tooth brush, dropping it again quickly after as he dragged first his fingers than the hair brush through his hair until it finally was no longer an outright mess. Looking at himself in the mirror again, his hair perfect, his face beautiful, he wondered weather he would always be this way: perfect on the outside, yet fighting fight after fight on the inside.

Frowning, he resisted the urge to throw something against the mirror. This, this right here was why he did not allow himself to think, why he never wanted to talk about anything. Living as he had been living so far was much, much better and he prayed to whatever deity that was out there at the moment, that he would get to keep it after today without upsetting it. Without Hari, he would have to return to the world painted in the shades of grey, and though that world was safe from self-analysis it was also slowly killing him with boredom. With Hari, however, he would have to talk, and he could feel the snake inside him crawling back to the surface once more. A defence mechanism. An escape patch...

Closing the door somewhat harder than it was necessary behind him, he stormed out into and through the room towards his part of the closet. Turning around to see what Hari was wearing so he would know what to chose for himself, he notice the man had made his bed. '' Thanks. You didn't have to do that'', he whispered, feeling ever so slightly guilty that Hari had had to not only drag him of bed but deal with the mess that had left. It was somewhat an unusual feeling. He had never felt it before.

Turning around again, he started to dig through his numerous clothes in search of a nice, black jeans and a white shirt that didn't look like he had slept in it. Finally finding what he was looking for, he started to dress himself, getting more than halfway there before remembering that he should have probably also included underwear in his outfit. Debating on whether he should undress himself and correct that or carry on as he had started, he finally thought to ask Hari.

''Where are we going anywhere?''

Having decided that getting undressed simply to get dressed again with nothing happening in between those two actions was not worth the energy, Sebastian finished dressing himself, before diving into his closet once more, this time in search of the single leather bracelet that he for some reason he could not remember if he tried owned and a wallet. He didn't really need either, he knew, it was simply a way of stalling and putting off the fact that sometime soon he would have to step outside and the Dreaded Date Day would begin in truth. Before he could find them, however, he felt Hari's hands hugging him from behind and a kiss being pressed to his head in affection. Almost immediately the tension in his shoulders drained by at least a half.

''I can just as well be important to you here, lover'', Sebastian said, turning around so he could lean his forehead against Hari's, looking in his warm, even now startling in colour, eyes. ''But fine. Let's get on with this triple D'', he said, chuckling slowly as he stepped away from the closet with his bracelet found, but with no sign of his wallet. He still held onto Hari for tension draining as he felt that his previous dread was bound to return the minute he let go of the man, but for a moment he was no longer as afraid. What Hari had described sounded almost nice, in a sedated, no, we are not just going out so we could have sex in public sort of way. He wasn't quite sure if he would like it yet, but at least he was willing to give it a try, for a moment. He could promise nothing about his behaviour if he got bored by all the serenity. Or if Hari suddenly changed his mind and started pressuring him to talk about something he would not talk about.

''Here, give me that'', Sebastian said, prying the picnic basket out of Hari's hands. ''You cooked, I can carry'', he explained as they exited the building into a slowly warming weather. The sunlight soaked into his skin, relaxing him even further than before. The snake part of him was wide awake today and there was nothing he could do about it almost purring as his skin bathed in the warmth. ''It's going to be hot today'', he noted as they made their way across campus towards the courtyard.

''I like the heat'', Sebastian said, closing his eyes for a moment and raising his head towards the sun. Soon however he made himself step forward again, for otherwise he could have spent the whole day like that, the part of him that was more snake than human craving the heat like it craved water or air. The part of him that was more human than snake was indifferent, and those parts of both which made Sebastian was at his core were starting to get angry about there being so many parts in the first place. Which was yet another thing he did not want to think about, so he pushed it aside, his grip on Hari's hand tightening lightly as they walked slowly towards their destination.

It seemed to him as they did so that more than half of Starlight Academy had had the same idea as Hari, as the majority of the student body appeared to be out, either running around the Sports Field or simply walking around in the sun. What little of it remained outside, Sebastian thought, had to be either exactly like him, the only difference being that they have somehow managed to win the arguments they must have had with their Haris. Or, he thought, he had none to drag them out of bed in the first place, and the grip he had just managed to lighten suddenly got a whole lot tighter again.

Soon they were in the Courtyard, or at least Sebastian assumed so. He had never actually gotten this far from the dorms, not even when he had first arrived, considering that he had walked in the straightest line possible back than, finding a path which had lead him directly from his point of arrival to the dorm which he then proceeded to barely leave. There were trees around them, though, and Hari had said something about there being a forest where there were going, he was almost 90% percent sure of that, so it was safe to assume that this was that. Only, apparently not, or at least not quite yet.

Hari continued leading him off the path, through the forest, following only he knew which signs. Finally, after some more walking through a barely contained forest, Hari grinned at him. ''Finally'', he said, turning around himself as he slowly set the picnic basket down to the ground. Whatever was inside it was heavy, and he honestly didn't know how Hari had meant for them two to eat all of that. The place, however, was beautiful in itself and he said as much.

''It's one hell of a hiding place, I must admit'', Sebastian said, pulling an item after item and putting them to the ground in random order. ''Though not much of a secret any more, is it?'', he grinned, sitting down by the food and trying to count what exactly had his lover made instead of just guessing. Definitely, Hari had made entirely too much food. ''However, I guess it will be again after you eat me once I'm all good and fattened up from all these food'', he joked, eyeing the feast before him.