Accidental Thief

This girl was odd. Like him odd, not like everything else here that was odd. She was shaking, acting like she was enraged by his answer. He wondered if he shouldn’t tell her such things, it would probably be safer. For him and her. It was strange how much Shadow longed to keep these things inside and yet felt like he wanted someone to share his plight. She seemed like someone who had shared his plight. But for her question he felt a twinge of jealousy. He would give anything to start over, to forget everything and just be a new person. Leave Shadow behind as his family had left him behind. Clean and new.

Shade watched her warily. She looked angry and it was creepy to see such a young girl with such an enraged expression. The shadows swirled around him, prepared to protect him should he call for their aid. He had seen angry people before and it never ended well for him. It usually led to a beating or some other unpleasantness. It didn’t matter if it was anger at him or not. He and the others he had heard from a distance were just dummies to be the recipient of anger. They didn’t matter. Shadow knew if they had happened to kill him, it wouldn’t matter. They’d toss him into the snow and let the wolves take care of the rest.

Shadow shook his head, no. It wasn’t a complete lie. He had an idea of who, but it could have been anyone in that place. If he had to point someone out of a lineup he would have failed. He was afraid of what she might do or what questions she might ask if he told her he knew. Instead the frightened boy deflected. “Do you have amnesia?” He hoped that would turn her attention to herself and then he could learn if she did in fact have anything in common with him. Her expression was very similar to ones he had seen for a brief moment here and there in that place. If she had had a similar experience, Shade wasn’t sure what he would do. But a part of him felt it might be nice to have someone understand.

Shadow bit back a sigh of relief when she didn’t press any further. He had no idea that other people here may have been through something similar to him. It wasn’t like he knew the other people where he had come from, but perhaps they had come from this place. That thought made him shiver all over and the darkness squeezed itself around him, trying to ward off that thought. Shadow wasn’t used to talking to people and the last time he had seen someone crying he had stood across the room and slid a box of tissues to her. It didn’t register to him to say something to make someone feel better. He just did what he’d seen other people do when he was in the hospital.

Shade flinched, what was happening? He couldn’t tell if she was crying for herself or for him, this girl was very confusing. His expression didn’t change and he only concluded that he wasn’t going to understand anything when she spoke, sobbing and asked for his name. Maybe this was normal, Shadow wondered, crying never got you anywhere. Crying tended to make things worse, the safest thing was to keep his expression flat, that way they couldn’t tell what he liked to take it away and they couldn’t tell what he didn’t like to keep it happening.

Maybe Nia had found crying worked for her, maybe it actually got people to leave her alone. If that was the case, Shade couldn’t understand why she was introducing herself, that was (if his limited experience was something to go on) usually an initiation of conversation. “Shadow,” he answered. Silence followed and Shade watched Nia. Maybe she needed someone to talk to, even if he wasn’t interested in reliving his experiences, perhaps it helped her. Shadow wasn’t a good talker, but he was a good listener. Finally, he found himself uncomfortable enough to venture the question: “Why are you crying, Nia?”

People were confusing. There were so many ways that these interactions with new people were destroying everything he thought he knew about people. He didn’t like it. At least the people he had known before had had a method of operation that Shadow understood. People who’s smile meant nothing good for Shade, their anger meant nothing good for Shade. Basically, any facial expression made Shade wary. Nia in particular was confusing. Kaz had been odd and his smile disarming, but his motives… Shadow didn’t think they were malicious.

But here was Nia, her lips upturned in a smile even as tears streamed down her face. Shade had seen a similar look on Daniel’s mother’s face, but he didn’t understand it any more now. Shadow cocked his head. He doubted the truth of her words. She was starting to scare him, in a different way than she had before. Before she had surprised him, now he had a sinking feeling in his gut that came with confusion.

A mood disorder? He wondered. Watching her as she explained, Shade found himself feeling… something… if he’d known the name for it he would have called it empathy. They were two extremes of a spectrum, he realized. Nia’s visible array of emotions that she couldn’t control, and Shadows meticulous control that gave his eyes the dull, far off look.

But something still bothered him. He looked at the pile of food at his feet. Stolen food. He reminded himself with a twinge of guilt. Maybe Nia wasn’t going to turn him in, but someone would certainly suspect something if they saw this. Food was a strong motivator for Shade and he crouched in the shadows. “I… I know it’s not mine, but…” Shadow said slowly, taking a bag of the orange Doritos and holding it out to Nia. Shade was working with a childlike logic. He liked the Doritos and so they made him happy, so they must make other people happy, so if he gave them to Nia, she would be happy.

A strange wave of… something… passed over him. It was a warm feeling, alarmingly light, unfamiliar, but not unknown. It was like the pleasantness of contentment, but more. Somewhere deep down Shadow recognized the feeling. In his mind, Shadow smiled, but the sensation never reached his outward expression, dying out behind years and years of walls and safeguards. “Doritos,” Shade echoed absently, as if testing the pronunciation on his own tongue. It was odd, Shade reflected, how many different smiles people had. Kaz had the constant easy smile. The nurses at the hospital had a calm and gentle smile. The people There had cruel smiles. Chloe, the demon in the night, she had a pitying smile. Nia, she had a sad smile.

Shadow shrank back as she reached into her pocket, watching her warily. He watched her with fascination, real people did the weirdest things. He wondered if they thought it was weird. Raising a brow, Shadow stood and craned his neck to see what she had done. It took some time for him to decipher her handwriting, but she didn’t use any words he didn’t recognize. “Thank you,” Shadow replied, relieved that she decided not to turn him in. Strangely enough, as odd as he found her, he didn’t find her as threatening as some other people around here. Maybe it was because she behaved odd, like him. Some unspoken understanding.

Shaking his head, no, Shadow knelt to gather his haul and then realized that just like Kaz, she was going out of her way to get him food. He looked up at her and stood, his snacks cradled in his arms. He looked at the note again and memorized the number for her room and made a mental resolve to pay her back. Perhaps he should also pay back Kaz. Kaz asked too many questions, but he was kind. Nia was kind. It had yet to be seen if there were ulterior motives, Shade would keep his eyes open for it. Shadow gestured with his eyes toward the magic box (which he now knew was not a free magic box) and said, “And thank you for…” he wasn’t sure if that was a thing people did, technically she could have just turned him in, he’d avoided authority since he had gotten here, but he knew inevitably he’d screw something like this up.