A night on the town.

"Do they now," Alice asked with feigned nervousness. She looked around as though she were afraid of spies, but in truth, she was looking in all seriousness. It was Friday night, and not all that late. There would probably be activity for a great deal of the night. But because of the rain, all that activity was situated inside. Alice did not need to work hard to maintain their cover anymore with the building providing most of it now. She almost totally released the cover, but before she did, she approached Alex in that dark, knowing that Alex could see her eyes if not all that much else. Alice closed the distance, her eyes locked on Alex's, until she could feel Alex's breath. She stopped there with a wide grin. "We wouldn't want t'give them something t'cast rumors about then, would we?"

Alice dropped her influence on the wind and cast them both in darkness. Alice found the building key, recognizable for being like a basic house key, and opened their way in. Alice felt redness on her face that had nothing to do with the cold outside. Where had that come from? There was no magic room to explain it. Alice felt a rush of confidence and nervousness at the same time. How would Alex take that gesture? She tried to get her mind off her impulsive act for the moment. As it had been almost a whole day ago, the halls had their dim lights on. She saw other girls walking the halls. She heard music and laughter. Friday night was in full swing. Alice headed for the stairs, glancing behind her, trying to keep the same grin she had earlier, but found her attempt dampened by nervousness.

Alice felt happy all the way up the stairs leading up to the third floor hall with the blue lights in silver frames. She laughed quietly at the inevitable deja vu. Looking down the hall, she saw a short-haired person being yanked into one of the rooms. The building, despite its dignified stature, held those observing a weekend, gilded veneer or not. With the voices and sounds of music and video games going on, Alice felt elevated, like she was part of a community of people like her. She drew out the twenty-edged silver key from her pocket and opened their door.

"Ha! Home sweet home, right?"

Alice sat down on her bed and undid her boots after relighting the old candle on her nightstand. “Because they went well with th'dress and they didn't seem so bad at first,” she said sympathetically while pulling the boots off and placing them tucked between the nightstand and the wall. Alice flopped backwards on her bed, narrowly missing the wall, and stretched her toes in her loosened black socks. She looked at the dresser next to the foot of the bed and considered putting away her jumper dress as it was starting to tug uncomfortably at her shoulders. She pushed it up over her head and tossed it over Alex and onto the dresser. She felt herself cooling with her blouse left, and she sank into the mattress. “That's th'best part – taking th'things off.” She brushed her fringe out of her face and stared up at the bubbly white ceiling paint until shapes started to stand out in the constellation of bumps lit by the tiny flame.

A song appeared in Alice head and she began to wiggle her toes to the drum beats. What a day it had been. She had been to the city twice first in the early morning and then back on the date with Alex. She recounted the date, the building, but especially the revelation that Alex had once been male. Once. Alice wondered what that had been like. Alice got uncomfortable with her legs hanging off the bed and rotated so her head was next to Alex and her feet could rest on the small headboard. She hummed a sigh. “Long day...”

“Hey!” Alice's face warmed from the hiding embarrassment at her unexpected rest.

Alice rotated and kicked herself off the bed. She smoothed her skirt, noticing with some annoyance that it had gotten really wrinkled over the course of the day. One of the downfalls of cotton, she thought in the back of her mind. She walked to the bathroom and felt out her brush in the dark and attacked the knots the moisture in the air had left for her. It was the doing of something, noting small details that drew her away from what was front and center in her mind.

Did it all need to be awkward? Alice was sharing a room with a boy who had been made a girl, a girl who had quickly come to like her in a way she had never known in her isolation. To Alice, materialistic differences were not relevant, so she acted; she let the dinner become a date, her first date. She even flirted later! In so short of time, she let herself see another as attractive. What awoke this? Alice stopped feeling knots and put the brush away. Maybe awkwardness was a choice. Did anything so far feel wrong? No, she answered. That would have to be that for now.

At the foot of her bed, Alex was searching for the zipper of her dress. “I swear, whoever makes the zipper part easier should get a million for it. Want help?” Alice realized that she had a lock of hair wrapped in a finger. Damn, more knots.

Alice climbed back on the bed and scooted up behind Alex. Alice looked up the line of the dress where the track of small zipper teeth was hidden in the royal blue of the fabric that gave the candle light only a small amount of reflection. Alex's straight brown hair covered the top of the track. Alice felt a little envious. Alex's hair had frizzed a small amount from being outside in the rain, but it didn't look like Alex would be pulling her hair thin just trying to get out the knots like Alice had felt like. “Excuse me, can't quite see th'zipper.”

Alice wanted to be careful not to pull Alex's hair, so she had her fingers ride up the top of the dress before Alex's tips started, so she would not snag her nails on any small knots, then, when she found Alex's neck, she glided Alex's hair over her shoulder. Alice spotted the zipper just barely visible between the folds of the dress and, making sure not to jam the zipper on the small teeth of the track, pulled down cautiously and stopped when she saw the strap and clasps wrapped around Alex. A certain pressure made itself known in Alice's breath, but she quickly recommenced the slow pull down of the zipper until she had finished. Alice found herself looking up the length of Alex's back up to her neck, absorbing details she had not intended on.

“There y'go,” she said with quickly regained composure, though glad that the low light would not betray the color of the growing heat in her face. Alice pressed her palms to the bed and scooted back, pulling her skirt back to its full length from her knees back to her ankles.

Alice watched Alex go to her side of the room and slip off the dress. Her eyes first focused on the right side of Alex's back where the light made her most visible and followed her form to her shoulders. She felt a sudden quickening in her chest and she imagined drawing Alex closer by the flowing angle of those shoulders, imagined the feel of gliding her hands over them, and Alice fell back on the bed, shutting the vivid thought. She watched the flickering of the tiny fire in the inverted mountain range on the ceiling, feeling the feverish response of her thoughts, the tight knot of quavering at the center of her breath. When she could feel Alex's small footfalls coming back, Alice feigned the sleepiness she had only minutes ago. Whatever remained of that promise of dreams evaporated like drops of water on an electric burner, but she forced her face to loosen all the same.

”Alice I need to hear you say something. Are you sure you are comfortable with this. With me and what we are doing?”

Faking nonchalance felt petty when Alice could hear a tension in Alex's voice that sounded like the voice in her thoughts, begging for the status quo and the impulse at the same time, so Alice let her eyes open as full as her tension. She sat up and faced Alex, the fishnets on her legs making Alice remember her imagining, as if Alex was telling Alice that she could not hide from it. She wanted to sweep away the light with a tiny gust and cast them in total dark, but that too felt petty. Instead, she remembered her breath and edged closer to Alex until they were knee to knee.

“I haven't...have not felt this way before. This...is not television. I feel like I changed the moment I got to this place, like my life...just started again. I feel like I want to stop watching life...I want to be a part. The way you look at me...” Alice could feel moisture gathering at her hairline. She paused, but not to think. To breathe. “I feel really...good, but I do not know what I am doing, only that you...you as you are...I would not mind being closer to you.” Alice felt so nervous that her eyes began to water. She squeezed her eyes with a blink and held Alex's gaze. “I am sorry...I apologize if that is not what you wanted to hear.” She wanted to look down, feeling every inch naïve, but she made herself stay as she was.