Tears In The Bushes

EmiRose

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To say that Xaviosz was not having a good day would be an understatement. His breathing felt shallow, his hands were shaky and he saw black dots winking and bouncing at the edges of his vision. It had been like this since morning, and Xavi couldn't concentrate on classes at all. It was good he didn't really have to, since exams were over and graduation around the corner.
Xavi knew why he was feeling like this. Soon he would have to feed again, and just the thought of that made him want to hide away and cry. That was about all he could do to feel better right now, since Xavi's and his sister's lives depended on him getting the sexual energy they needed.
So that was exactly what he would do. No matter how destructive it was to his mind.

Xavi was able to flee class immediately when it ended, and he half jogged and half speedwalked away from the academy. On the way to the city Xavi strayed from the path and wandered into the woods, where he knew he could get some privacy to get the worst of it out.
It didn't yake Xavi long to find a good, relatively isolated spot and sit down there, hugging himself. Xavi's shoulders shook as he started letting out stifled sobs, and his tears started falling silently and humbly. Just like him. Xavi leaned against a tree and hugged his knees, his sobs getting slightly louder with every tear. He didn't want his sister to see him like this, to know what Xavi was going through to keep her alive. So as the woods as his witness Xavi let a small part of his pain fall to the grass.


@Romi
 

Romi

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Jude was good at a lot of things, but finding efficient routes of travel was not one of them. He was used to the city, to the alleys, to memorizing giant maps and finding his way around that way. But much of the island was just forest, all but unmapped in any sense but the most general. If Jude wanted to find the fastest way, he would have to physically find the fastest way, wandering through the woods, finding the best routes, and then manually timing things to make sure he'd be able to get between classes and work.

At least he had time to figure it out.

Jude looked pretty scratched up after several hours of cutting through the forest, forging his own paths with a body that was definitely not intended to do that exact thing. He wasn't quite dirty, but he had given up on trying to keep the leaves from getting on his clothes, and there were plenty of small scratches on his skin from pushing through.

And that specific trek through the woods would have been fine... if Jude hadn't abruptly heard a noise. He went still, trying to be quiet, trying to listen but still so painfully unfamiliar with the sound of the woods. He wondered if he'd ever really be in tune with nature like people said they were. Probably not. Probably never. There was too much randomness, too much he couldn't handle.

But the sound was a human sound. Crying, if Jude was right, and his first thought was that someone had gotten hurt.

So he listened carefully, reoriented, and cut a careful path towards the noise. From the sound of it, they couldn't be far, and it wasn't more than a minute before he spotted Xavi, sitting at the base of a tree and hugging his knees.

He was crying, but he didn't look hurt, and Jude's brain abruptly screech to a stop as he tried to assess the situation and came up with... nothing.

He was just crying.

So maybe not hurt at all.
 

EmiRose

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Xavi kept his face pressed against his knees as he let his sobs die down on their own. He was deep in his own head, concentrating on taking steady, deep breaths and preventing hyperventilation.
He couldn't go on like this for long. Xavi knew that. These episodes had been happening too often. Xavi either needed to get used to feeding, or ask Vexi to start doing it again. But Xavi knew Vexi needed time, she needed his support to get through this change in her life, in order for her to become a better person. A thing Xavi had thought, after years of keeping hope alive, was impossible.
But seemed he was wrong, or at least he prayed so, and Xavi would do anything in his power to help Vexi.

After a second Xavi, still sobbing a bit, lifted his head to stare at a bush in front of him. At the corner of his eye he caught movement and spun his head to look at that direction. He saw a boy, who looked familiar. Oh, yes, the boy who had asked about his hair. Jude? Yes, Xavi believed it was Jude.
After the rather calm initial reaction Xavi panicked and stood up, opening and closing his mouth. But suddenly Xavi's head spun a bit and he had to lean on the tree he was sitting against. Had Jude seen Xavi cry? Would he tell anyone? Oh no, if he did Vexi would certainly hear about it. She had ears everywhere.
"Th-this isn't what it looks like. I-"
Xavi started explaining, one sob escaping his mouth during, but he stopped when he saw Jude was all scratched up. Xavi blinked and frowned slightly.
"Are you okay? You look a bit...ruffled."
Xavi's tone was shy but gentle, and worry could also be clearly heard in it.
 

Romi

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He was definitely crying. No two ways about it. Even if he tried to play it off, rubbing at his eyes and hiding his face, there was no way that Jude could fail to realize. He wasn't sure there was even a point of trying to play it off as something he'd failed to notice.

After a moment, Jude decided there was no point in playing pretend.

"I'm fine," Jude said. "I was just cutting through the bushes. Are you alright?" From the looks of him--and his insistence and that it wasn't what it looked like, he was pretty sure that he wasn't physically hurt. If he'd broken his leg or something he wasn't going to say 'no, this isn't what it looks like!' because it'd be exactly what it looked like.

He was just upset.

Which was normal.

Jude's face looked pinched in concern as he watched Xavi.
 

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Xavi was very well aware there was no convincing Jude that he was alright. No person who was alright came into the woods like this to cry, if they had shoulders to cry on or had all their problems in check. And the truth was that Xavi was most certainly not okay.
But he did not want to burden practically a stranger with his problems, again. Xavi did not want to bother anyone over someone like him.
"Cutting through the bushes? Um, why would you? If I can ask."
Xavi asked, his voice more steady now, as he dried his eyes and cheeks on his sleeves. Xavi looked down bit timidly, when he considered what to answer Jude's question.
"I...I'll be fine. Thank you."
Xavi fidgeted with his shirt hem for a bit, being eay too obvious about the fact that his answer was pretty much bullshit.
 

Romi

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"I'm just trying to figure out the fastest way between the transit hub and my classes," Jude said, not feeling any need to hide it. It was simple enough. "I'm short on time getting back and forth."

It was a nice distraction, a quick explanation, and it seemed to give Xavi a bit of time to get himself together. Wiping at his eyes. Swallowing down the lump that was almost definitely in his throat.

"Well," Jude said, weighing his words. "I mean. We're not super close or anything, but sometimes that can be helpful? Like, explaining your concerns to a stranger, because you know the stranger doesn't know enough about your situation to judge you or anything like that. Because you can just say whatever, and you don't have to worry about their own viewpoint adjusting things."

Which was a very roundabout way to just say I'm here to talk if you want, only significantly more elaborate then it needed to be.

Jude leaned against a tree and tried to look casual.
 

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Xavi listened to Jude's explanation and nodded slightly. He kind of wanted to inquire further but didn't want to bother him so Xavi let it go. Instead he dug a bit in his pocket.
"Um, if you'd like I have some bandaids. Well, not as many as you would probably need, but...still."
Xavi pulled out three standard bandaids, bit crumbled but usable.
"For...for the scratches, I mean."
It was easier for Xavi to forget and push aside his own worries if he was allowed to be worried for someone else.

Xavi listened, at first bit confused, how Jude went out of his way to offer him an ear. Xavi felt guilty, he had caused an almost stranger to be worried about him. This was all like with Morgan again, though Xavi was grateful for that encounter. Xavi looked down bit timidly.
"I'm...my worries aren't really...appropriate to share with strangers. You would judge, no matter what. But I'm very thankful for your offer, it's so kind of you to offer help."
Xavi tried smiling a bit but it turned out pretty weak.
 

Romi

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Jude reached up with his good hand, rubbing at a cut on his forehead with his thumb. It wasn't that bad, but his finger still came away red, and he grimaced.

He was going to need a shower.

"No, it's fine," Jude said, trying to reassure him. "I've had way worse--I just need to clean off the mess I think." He didn't really feel hurt or anything. All the scratches were minor. So there wasn't anything to worry about there.

"It's fine if you don't want to," Jude said, feeling the bark of the tree against his back. "We could talk about other stuff. But, uh, I should say-" Okay, well, no, he was going to say he wasn't judgmental, but he was, just not normally for stuff that people would get judgmental over. His father was a damned mafioso, he had a pretty high tolerance for things that defied the social spectrum.

"But I won't judge. I can promise that," And if he did? Well, Xavi would never know. He was crying out in the woods alone. He needed someone to talk to.
 

EmiRose

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Xavi saw the cut on Jude's forehead and how it bled, and shuffled his feet a bit. He carefully went over to Jude and shyly gave him sone of the bandaids, looking down a bit.
"At least one, please. You can choose if you use it or not. I have a lot of spares."
Xavi tried to give Jude a small smile bit failed pretty miserably.

There were many people on the island who weren't judgmental, at least on the outside. But there was silent, condemning judgment and that was what Xavi was most afraid of. But he felt like he needed to say something, it'd be rude to leave Jude hanging after he offered to listen. Xavi sighed a bit and fiddled with his hair a bit, so his bangs were more in front of his face.
"I...soon need to do something I would...rather not do. But...I'm doing it for someone important to me. They need me. So I guess I...need some time to vent and...mentally prepare myself for what I need to do."
Xavi's mind did feel a bit lighter after saying these words, but there was also crushing guilt for shouldering Jude with this, and guilt for habing the gall to complain. Xavi should be happy to help his sister.
 

Romi

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Jude accepted the bandaid, even if he didn't think he needed it, and then carefully selected the worst of the scrapes before applying it. He dropped the wrapper in his back, careful not to litter before turning his attention back to Xavi.

Oh. This was going to be, uh, awkward. Did he just say it? Considering what Jude knew, it was a pretty safe bet what it was that they were talking about. Jude actually looked genuinely embarrassed as he shifted in place, reaching up to scratch absentmindedly at his face as he weighed his options.

Honestly. That's what Rory had wanted, and even if he barely knew Xavi, it felt... disingenuous to try and hide it.

"Well, I..." Jude admitted. "I can actually tell what people's powers are, just from being around them. So if you're talking about having to feed, then I know, uh, what that entails."

Which was embarrassing, no two ways about it, but Jude was making an active effort to not look embarrassed. To look like it was just any other day. Like it was any other question.

"If you want to talk about that, you, uh, can."
 
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