Pain and Emotions

Elizabeth closed her eyes and hugged him back tightly. She was still crying, only now feeling the emotional pain her fathers death caused her. Perhaps if she'd never tried to control it, it wouldn't have been this bad. She could feel it as if it were a headache, though she thought this may have been more down to the sudden absence of her power. Still, she looked up at Soren and felt more than just pain. The feelings she had that night on the cruise returned and she knew that no matter what happened now with her emotions, she would have Soren. It was then she decided she wouldn't use her power to control emotions again.

Elizabeth kissed him back, gently. She pulled back with a small, grateful smile. "Honestly," she said, trying to lighten her voice, "I came out here to make sure you were okay and now I'm the ones who's a mess." She smiled at him again, wiping away the last of her tears and hugging him back. Suddenly, a sharp pain shot through her head and she winced in pain, pulling away. She kept her eyes closed for a few seconds, waiting for the pain to pass and then leant forwards with her head in her hands. Elizabeth was starting to realise that the absence of her power was going to cause her a few more problems than she'd ever considered it might.

"Yeah," she forced out, "I'm fine." Elizabeth looked up at him and realised there was no way the two of them could ever even start a relationship if she didn't tell him. As much as she didn't want to bother him with her problems, if they were going to be so visible then he needed to know. "No, actually I'm probably not and I don't think I'm going to be for a while." She paused for a moment, trying to see how he would react to what she was about to tell him.
Taking a breath and looking at the floor, she continued, "you know about my powers right? At least a little bit. Well, the mind shifting part of it allows - allowed - complete control over everything, including my emotions. After my fathers death I started to use it more than I had before. It stopped being something where I would just calm myself down to focus and became a way to stop me feeling anything at all so I didn't have to deal with my fathers death. From there, it grew. I stopped wanting to access my emotions completely. It let me focus more, my memories weren't in any way changed or affected by my own visions. For someone like me who only has being 'the smart kid', it was a miracle. I guess its why I never made many friends here I started saying things just as they were, no kind of emotional conscience to stop what I was saying or doing. I suppose, in a way, it made me almost... sociopathic. Until the cruise I hadn't let the power slide for years. Then the alcohol kind of switched it off I guess, for want of a better word. I realised that there were emotions other than pain and hurt and for that one night I really felt something with you. Then we woke up and it was back to normal. Its why I've been so off with you. I finally realised what I'd been doing, distancing myself and I had to decide whether to keep using it or not. Its only today, just now, that I decided to let it go."
Elizabeth paused, breathing deeply. She looked up again at Soren waiting for his reaction to her speech. She'd never told anyone this much before. "I'm sorry," she added, "for not telling you sooner."

Elizabeth nearly gasped in relief, she hadn't even realised she'd been holding her breath. No way would she have ever thought that anyone would anyone ever respond like that. She'd expected him to run, it wasn't his problem after all. It was all anyone else seemed to do when they figured she was 'different'. But then, everyone here was 'different'. Its why they were all on this island. Still shocked but the happiest she'd been able to feel for a long time, she hugged him hard and kissed him back.
"I never thought that-" Elizabeth stopped. She'd had enough of the speeches for today. "I love you Soren Haine, I really do."