Event Private Ouch I have lost myself again

All-day, Naisis had a craving for bunnies. Not for food (because she is an herbivore) but a plushie. Naisis had no idea why, but she has a definite suspicion on who was behind it: Avax Set. Occasionally he suggests an action the other would not think of, but for a good reason. This had all the earmarks of being that. With a sigh, she decided to humor him.

Finding the nearest toyshop, she headed in only to be confronted with a discounted pile of purple rabbit plushies. She laughed and shook her head. That is when she felt that all too familiar hand on her shoulder and an equally familiar voice whisper in her ear, "his favorite color." She also felt something slipping into one of her pockets. She looked back; sure, he would not be there.

Well, he has sent her on another mission. This one she will accept. The one time she turned down one of his tasks, disaster struck, and millions died. Picking up a plushie, she headed to the cashier, bought it, and put it in a bag. She became aware that although she had the rabbit, she had no idea who it was for. Aha! Putting down the bag, she fished through that pocket to find a piece of paper. On it were the name Ishvi and the room number in the hospital. She was surprised with the purple bunny; it was not what she would suspect an Angel or Nightmare would be interested in. Shoving the paper back into her pocket and picking up the bag, she headed to the hospital.

Things became more difficult with the recent loss of her left arm, such as signing things (since she was lefthanded). Fortunately, the cashier was kind enough to hold the receipt while she awkwardly signed with her right hand.

Reaching the hospital, she was led to the room Ishvi was in. Stepping inside, she was surprised that he was still in Nightmare form. She had heard some about what happened after she got trapped, and, from the looks of it, he might have been there at the end.

"Ishvi, I heard you have been hurt and came to visit. Oh," she handed him the bag with the rabbit plushie, "I was told you might like this."

Naisis was still limping and hurting from her ordeal. Seeing Ishvi was in a similar situation, she opened the bag and pulled out the rabbit putting it in his lap.

"So are you. I understand it is customary to bring a gift when visiting a friend in the hospital."

She sets down then glances at her missing arm. "I lost this on my way to Aezjtdaenr. I fell into a hole. When I woke up, I was in the animal hospital being patched up. They could not save my leg er arm."

Fortunately for her, she was unconscious and did not know of the times she should have been in the morgue.

With a chuckle, she added, "well, so much for my fun," she rolled her eyes, accenting the sarcasm, "times in that place. How are you feeling?"

Although she suspected he had a story to tell, he did not look like he was up to it or even wanted to.

That look on Ishvi's face was all so familiar to Naisis., being a creature of illusions and deceptions. Anytime she did something real, she usually got that look.

She smiled, "I can assure you it is quite real."

His blunt remark made her laugh, "Well, I hope so since that is what I paid for." she looked upward and replied softly, "A little pony told me."

She grinned when Ishvi said he appreciated it, "Thank you."

Her face softens, "You are not supposed to, but thank you for the thought."

But, when he headed down that path of self-blame, one she knew very well, she was first appalled, then became somber. He did not need a lecture, but understanding.

When he finished, her face became somber as she leaned forward and replied in a calm, authoritative voice, "Exactly - you don't know and never will. This should-of, would-of, could-of is nothing more than a deception. Learn from your past - yes - but do not live in them; they will destroy you."

She sat back in her chair. Her face softened, as did her voice, "After what I thought was a failure, someone a lot wiser and powerful than I gave me this advice: As long as you try your best, you will not fail. You might not accomplish what you were hoping. But as long as you try to do something, it might not be your best; you will never be a failure."

She paused and looked down, ashamed, in a little louder than a whisper, "It is when you do nothing you fail."

Naisis looked towards the ceiling rolling her eyes and shaking her head, "Great! Here I am supposed to be lifting your spirits. I am talking all gloom and doom."

She put on her friendliest face, "So what is the prognosis? How long until you can leave? And, after they let you go, would you mind if I take you out for dinner? From what I have heard, hospital food is not all that great."

Naisis smile as Ishvi all but snuggled up to the purple bunny. Evidentially she had made the right choice. But, she had to admit, she had a lot of help.

She could see some confusion in him, but that was not surprising. She was from a world where chaos and anarchy were everyday occurrences. So, being a bit confusing was normal for her. Still, she could keep it to a minimum.

She saw the pain in Ishvi's eyes when he let go of the statue. Picking it up, she realized why.

Putting it in his lap, she remarked, "There is a lot of pain in this life. None of it is necessary."

But when he once again delved into self-pity, she shook her head, "There was no way you or anybody could make it worst. It was already that bad when we got there. It has been going on for centuries, if not millennia. I honestly doubt we could have made it any worst or better, for that matter. "

She sighed a bit downhearted, "The best we could hope for was to end it."

She looked up and smiled, "Ah yes, but it is those things you do because you want to that has true value."

She rose a bemused brow and chuckled, "Well, this is different. Most of the time, I am criticized for being too mean. This is the first time I have been accused of being too nice."

She sat back and smiled, "I kind of like it. You can accuse me of being too nice all you want."

Naisis sighed. She knew how frustrating it could be to do your best and have it fail.

She smiled, "well, for one thing, I like you. Also, you can not be any more socially inept than I am. Being the Queen of Terror, I do not get invited to many social events."

She nodded, "so you did. Well, I like being nice. It is my means to combat the evil inside."

She became somber as she raised a brow, "Oh? Are you that bad? And, how did you injured it? I thought it was already wounded. I have seen worst, mine for one. One does not become the Queen of Terror by being nice. Nor did I become it by choice. Azure corrupted me."