First Session: John

Ephemral · Apr 17, 2018

John had been given mandated therapy sessions. While he had expected to get in trouble for simply stealing from the vending machine, the people taking care of him had sentenced him to 2-3 sessions a week with a therapist off of the assumption that he was mentally incapable of taking care of himself. The starvation in which he had subjected himself, in his opinion was his own prerogative. In short, He appreciated the care, but didn't appreciate the insinuation that he was mentally incapable of taking care of himself.

As a result of this John came to Valli's office with a bit of a petulant attitude. He didn't want to be there, but he was made completely aware that he was either to go to therapy or go to juvie.

John walked up to the door leading to the office and knocked. Hoping beyond all hope that the therapist was not there and John would have an excuse to go home or do anything else.

"Hi its John, I am here for my appointment"

@Romi

Romi · Apr 17, 2018

Valli's first impression of John had been... mixed. His overall impression had been that John was terribly naive, and probably in desperately need of therapy.

Thankfully, Valli didn't have long to wait. It hadn't been more than three days when he'd had John's name slide across his desk for mandatory therapy.

Considering what Gask had said, Valli suspected it was later than it probably should have been. He'd heard stories, and that was fairly rare. Normally he went into sessions completely blind, with no pre-existing opinions.

But he did his best to give John a blank slate when he heard the knock at the door.

"Come in," Valli called, taking a seat in one of the armchairs in the circle at the center of the room.

"I assume you remember me from the center, but if not, my name is Valli Bryndisarson. I should start by noting that, with a few brief exceptions, anything you say in a session remains completely confidential."

@Ephemral

Ephemral · Apr 18, 2018

When John had walked into the room he quickly scanned over everything that had populated the relatively small space. There was no waiting room, so the fact that the moment John had come in he had come into contact with his new therapist was not too jarring. He appreciated how neat the room was though, and also the fact that the room seemed to be blocked against the peering eyes of his peers.

John nodded to Valli as he walked in after making sure to close the door behind him and took a seat in the second armchair in the office. After a couple of seconds making himself comfortable on the seat John looked up at Valli.

"Huh, didn't figure I would see you in this sense. I'd imagine that you know most of my exploits here. To be completely transparent with you, I don't believe that I need therapy for the most part. I just value my freedom and the only reason I am here is because if I wasn't I'd probably be in prison."

John gave a small harrumph as he stared at Valli, not particularly sure what the oddly immaculate man would say as a response

"And just curious what doesn't stay confidential, so I can avoid all of those topics all together. If you have any questions about me and/or my situation please go ahead, so we can get this over with."

@Romi

((Just wondering would this be before or after ICC events?))

Romi · Apr 18, 2018

Valli was, all things considered, pretty used to I don't need therapy. It was common enough, especially when people were there unwillingly. But that would come after.

"I'm required by law to break confidentiality in cases where I believe a patient is an immediate danger to themselves or others. As far as other things you should know, I have a low level aura that makes me appear more... composed and put together than I would otherwise. It doesn't impair cognition, or how you see me any more than if I put extra effort into my appearance."

Well, that was one and two, but three still remained.

"While it matters a bit less since we've already met outside therapy, I won't acknowledge you or mention that you're a patient unless you do so first."

With his standard disclosures out of the way, Valli looped back around to the start.

"I am of the opinion that everyone should have therapy. People will go to the doctor for checkups for their physical health, but the idea of going for a mental health checkup is an alien concept. The brain needs attention just as much as the body. Going to therapy doesn't mean anything's wrong with you."

Entirely up to you! It's all the same to Valli.

Ephemral · Apr 19, 2018

John unconciously slightly tilted his head while listening. It was a odd trait he had picked up over the relatively small amount of time on the island. A low level aura did indeed make sense, the man just looked too immaculate in John's opinion. It was actually quite irritating, but that probably due to a mix of other emotions more than his dislike of clean and decent looking people, to be put simply he was on edge once he realized he was in a small enclosed space with a supposed "Doctor".

"Fine, I'll refer myself as a patient then because it would serve my purposes better and help me with justification of my actions later. That aside, was there a particular way you are going to check my 'mental health' because I can assure you that mentally I could not be better."

John sighs as he looks at Valli, John's arms cross as he sits on the chair. To be completely honest, John was not particularly comfortable in this type of environment now that the door was closed and he was sitting down. It was true that the room was a far cry from the days of his laboratory confinement, but he still was quite on edge since his earlier good impression of the room's cleanliness was replaced with John's innate dislike for sterile environments.

John put on a slight unconscious grimace not particularly out of any dislike for the man across from him more than the dislike of his situation.

@Romi

Romi · Apr 19, 2018

This was not the first time Valli'd dealt with a patient who didn't want to be there, and this wouldn't be the last. The majority of his patients were there voluntarily, having taken the first step towards recovery. Recognition always was, and whether or not John had something that could be considered a true mental illness, he certainly had trauma, even just from what little Valli knew about him.

Which would be the first step.

He didn't quite like the line of justifications of his actions, but he kept quiet on it, preferring to deal with the rest and mentally filing it away for later. It was just a bit ominously worded, and Valli had been attacked in his office once before and was in no hurry to do so again.

"There's no test I make you sit down and go through the checklist. Mostly we just talk. It helps me get an idea of why you were ordered to have mandatory therapy, and how I can help you move to a position where it's no longer necessary. Can you tell me a bit about your history before you came to the island?"

The past was always a good place to start.

Ephemral · Apr 19, 2018

John sighed as he looked at Valli. It definitely was not the first time that John had to relive the painful memories of his childhood and early teenage years. To be honest, he was quite annoyed with the frequency at which he had to answer the same question. John took a second to compose what he was going to say before actually starting. He had resolved not to fall into some sort of emotional breakdown this time when he told his story and told the story in the most tough way he could think of in order to ignore the possible emotional outbursts.

"I was raised in a bit of a cult, catholic based. I knew nothing of human civilization and I thought for the longest time that I went through a normal childhood. I learned most of what I know from books like Das Kapital, The art of war, and Dante's divine comedy. Around thirteen or fourteen I was coaxed to sign away my body to essential slavery and my parents forgot me and my existance, all the regular jazz like that. I was then subjected to a special lab rat treatment in a special facility. Simple things made simple, I wasn't allowed to see anything but white padded ground, ceiling, and walls for what I gather is about 2 years. I spent about a half year.... surviving in America before being caught and brought here. Everything here has been a real confusing mess, but I am doing my best to adapt."

John looked at Valli

"Pretty simple right, pretty par for the course for someone like you huh?"

@Romi

Romi · Apr 19, 2018

He was being flippant, which wasn't exactly a good sign. While he explained the whole thing clearly enough, there was also a lack of awareness that came with it, a lack of... severity? He described something truly horrific, and yet still insisted that he was fine, and that nothing was wrong.

"No," Valli said. "Not par for the course. The islands have an extremely high number of those with traumatic backgrounds, but what you described is unusual, even in terms of the island. Extreme. From one unhealthy environment to the next. And always in a mode of crisis. Never with the time or tools you need to unpack what happened to you and come to terms with it."

Valli paused for a moment, considering how to word things. His face darkened momentarily.

"And a sensory deprivation environment for two years...?"

That was bad, to say the least.

Ephemral · Apr 19, 2018

John considered the therapist's words for a moment before answering the direct question that he was asked.

"I have come to terms with it I'll have you know. In terms of what you said about the 'sensory deprivation chaber', I have no idea what that is but I know that everything was padded, noises seemed muted, walls were white, and tastes seemed to dull after a period of time as well"

John gave a unconscious shiver in response to talking about that one room. It was pretty clear from his body language he wasn't taking to talking about it too well.

"I have no idea how they got food inside the room, but it was always the same. White porridge, white bread with no crust, and milk or water. And dont get me started with the sha..."

John cut himself off

@Romi

Romi · Apr 19, 2018

Valli could not have disagreed more firmly with John's first point, but it didn't matter. What mattered was that he was talking, explaining what had happened. Even if he wasn't saying I'm still uncomfortable when I think about it, his body language made it clear enough how he felt. The little shiver. The way his eyes seemed to drift. He cut himself off before he could go too long, and Valli nodded briefly.

"Sensory deprivation is an environment where the human brain lacks stimuli. The padded walls would have kept you from hurting yourself, but they'd also have muffled the noises. There's nothing to look at, nothing to recognize. You're left with yourself. Scientists have done a lot of research into how the human mind copes on its own, and the results..." Valli's face pinched in apparent annoyance.

"Well, the results were bad. The fact that you're having this conversation is nothing short of amazing. True sensory deprivation can have excellent effects on the human mind, like... enhanced meditation. But the longer it goes on, the more the human mind seeks input. Like a car running without gas in the engine."

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