First Session: Eli/Elisa

Maybe he hadn't quite explained well enough, so he went back and came about it from another way.

"Would you say that, right now, you identify as fully female?" Valli asked.

Valli nodded. So their concept of their own gender was entirely fluid, changing as easily as slipping a charm on.

"Alright," Valli said. "While I'm not an expert, it sounds like you might identify as genderfluid. You don't have a fixed gender, but instead shift between multiple. At the end of the session I can pull some resources for you--I think I have some pamphlets, and a list of things you can look into that might help you."

Not a very big stack or anything, but they did exist.

"How many people have you told?"

For a moment, Valli seemed slightly confused. Maybe seven people knew. But he needed more information, so that was something he'd have to probably explicitly ask for.

"It seems you aren't actively telling people," Valli said, hoping for confirmation. "But that you are living at least part of your life as Elisa. Have you encountered any difficulties with that? Have you given thought to when you'll start telling those close to you?"

Valli was... definitely confused, and it showed on his face. His eyebrows furrowed together slightly as he tried to mentally map out what was happening. Even so, he still didn't quite get it. He was missing several key components.

"One thing to be aware of is what you might do if it becomes common knowledge, without your awareness. While you can swear people to secrecy, it sounds as if you ended up revealing yourself to a large group of people, and that means that information might get out sooner than you think."

He considered for a moment how to word things, only briefly drumming his fingers on the arm of his chair as he pondered.

"I think it might be helpful to think about how people might react to it, so you won't be caught off guard. How do you think people will react?"

Hm. Not exactly what he'd been expecting, and Valli opted to be extra careful with his words.

"I'm not quite so sure that you'll be that fortunate. While many people on the island are unbothered by things like gender transition, many people are bothered by secrets. Beyond certain species having cultural reservations about keeping secrets, even those who have none can feel put off that a friend would have such a big secret and not tell them. In those cases, the best defense is often just pointing out that it wasn't a secret, it just wasn't something you were ready to say. Not telling everyone everything isn't the same as lying to someone's face."