Coaching of an Art.

Rayana was walking somewhere.

The black haired woman had a pupose in her steps, her head held high and her boots stepping firmly on the ground. She was headed to a wonderful little place she knew of.

The vampire was wearing what she usually wore.

The woman was wearing a long flowing dark blood red coat with a light grey shirt undeneath. She wore black slightly snuggly pants which were tucked in her dark brown leather boots. Small black gloves were on her hands.

The vampire was at a lake.

The surroundings she found herself in where beautiful. On her right were a few trees gathered around a small lake. On her left were a series (SP) of mountains covered in snow.

Rayana was feeling allright.

Rayana was feeling allright, her mood was on the right side. Her mind was joyful, her heart soared higher than her usual neutral mood. A small grin was on her ashen face, her lips taking the shade of happiness.

http://z12.invisionfree.com/Starlight_Acad...?showtopic=2282

This linkie will help, check out my post, it will answer most of the questions you would have.

In your post, though it isn't too bad, you forgot to talk of your character's surroundings, her clothes and most of what you wrote is non descriptive. I suggest you reread your post, then add a sentence or two to describe her clothes and the surroundings.